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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Conflicted About Continuing, Divorcing/Custody, Co-parenting => Topic started by: Eco on March 23, 2013, 05:00:00 PM



Title: advice please
Post by: Eco on March 23, 2013, 05:00:00 PM
My uNPD/BPD xgf is being very difficult with letting me see our 3 week old daughter, she wanted to write the visatation and child support up herself but im not agreeing to that. Im going to talk to a lawyer next week that gives me free advice, the problem I face is financial end of that. im on a tight budget at the moment and I cant afford a lawyer if we go to court. we arent married and she hasnt put me down as the father so right now I have no rights in my state

any advice would be welcome


Title: Re: advice please
Post by: ForeverDad on March 23, 2013, 07:44:51 PM
Proving paternity these days is rather straightforward and courts have a process for that.  Actually, even if the court doesn't require a DNA paternity test, you should still do it at some point for yourself so you know without a doubt that you are or aren't the father.

One thing we've had to face here is that most disordered ones described here will give us less parenting time and authority than the courts would (seemingly almost grudgingly) allow or order.  So if you can't afford a lawyer court will probably still do better than leaving the decisions in the mother's control and emotion-driven whims.

What schedule is she wanting to gift you?  There's nothing wrong with letting her write up something, it can give you an idea of her thinking and what she thinks she will allow if left in control, it's just that you don't sign any agreement.  Likely she wouldn't even abide by it anyway.


Title: Re: advice please
Post by: Eco on March 24, 2013, 02:40:55 PM
thanks FD

Excerpt
What schedule is she wanting to gift you? 

she said that i could see her on saturdays and some sundays if she wasnt busy, also mondays.

Excerpt
There's nothing wrong with letting her write up something, it can give you an idea of her thinking and what she thinks she will allow if left in control, it's just that you don't sign any agreement.  Likely she wouldn't even abide by it anyway.

yes I want to see what she writes up, she also wants us both to sign it but I will not be doing that.

I dont know who this woman is anymore she is so cruel and vindictive I hve never met a woman this hateful. and what makes me sick is that she goes to church and pretends to be a christian, I really wish people could see her for what she really is