BPDFamily.com

Children, Parents, or Relatives with BPD => Parent, Sibling, or In-law Suffering from BPD => Topic started by: Lonelytraveller on March 31, 2013, 03:59:54 PM



Title: New to forum seeking advice
Post by: Lonelytraveller on March 31, 2013, 03:59:54 PM
Hi I have been living with my BPD sister for the past 28 yrs (we all still live at home together). Although I love her very much it has been very difficult to live with her and now that I'm moving out i receive a daily onslaught of yelling and screaming and getting in my face.

I came to the forum because although I feel valid in my position she is making me feel like I am a bad person and maybe I shouldn't be moving out and I need a different perspective.

Thanks


Title: Re: New to forum seeking advice
Post by: Kowaco on March 31, 2013, 04:33:16 PM
One thing you have to remember is that it's never OK to get in some ones face and scream at them.  She may have a hard time with you etc, but something is wrong if someone is in your face screaming


Title: Re: New to forum seeking advice
Post by: BioAdoptMom3 on March 31, 2013, 07:31:53 PM
  and  *welcome*!  Living with someone with BPD is incredibly difficult!  I know as our 13 y/o DD has it!  This board seems to be very supportive and encouraging!  We're not glad you need to be here, but glad you found us!


Title: Re: New to forum seeking advice
Post by: mamachelle on March 31, 2013, 11:00:14 PM
Hi Lonelytraveller,

*welcome*

It sounds like you are dealing with some big changes right now. People with BPD have a hard time with these types of transitions- moving on, moving out... .   and so they often react very intensely. Have you read the book, "I hate you. Don't Leave Me"? Well the title says a lot even if you haven't read the book.

I see from your other post you have a serious BF and your S is angry about that as well as the moving in with him.

Just wanted to ask a few more questions:

Are your parents supportive of your move and are they also still living at home with you?

Do you have other siblings?

Is she an older or younger sister?

Having a sister act this way is very confusing I know.

I would suggest you pick this book Essential Family Guide (https://bpdfamily.com/book-reviews/essential-family-guide-borderline-personality-disorder) up this week to help you learn some strategies to make your move go easier than it has so far.

There are many here who can offer you advice and wisdom as well for improving your relationship with your sister while also helping you gain your independence from her by learning how to set and maintain healthy boundaries.

Looking forward to hearing more about you and your family.

Yours,

mamachelle