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Title: A Good Weekend Post by: bb12 on April 07, 2013, 09:18:00 PM I had the best weekend in my recovery so far
Been NC for a long time now. 15 months since the silent treatment screws were turned and 8 since I gave up trying to get him to communicate This weekend marked the very first that my mind has not defaulted to the break-up and BPD. I was in the moment and happy and busy and calm. It is a milestone for me. And that progress can only be noted in the direct comparison to my normal state of sadness or pre-occupation Letting go and detaching might be as simple as not wanting our exes to have any part of our lives If I examine my life now... . and the wonderful friends I have made; the good and bad dates I have been on; the spring in my step... . I want them to remain MINE I was so used to giving myself up completely to my exBPD that I did not really save anything for myself. It's a lovely feeling to be protective of myself and my new emerging world and to have no urge to give it all away willy nilly. I am proud of who I am now... . proud of what is rising from the ashes... . and feel no pull to share the new me with anyone other than worthy people. Not sure about you guys, but my lack of boundaries or self-knowledge was a big factor in all of this. I think I have both now BB12 Title: Re: A Good Weekend Post by: Want2know on April 07, 2013, 09:21:34 PM This makes me smile, BB12!
I am in the same boat. It is a wonderful feeling! Title: Re: A Good Weekend Post by: Diligence on April 08, 2013, 12:08:45 AM Bravo, bb12! |iiii
I look forward to enjoying the same safety with friends and delight in life! You encourage me! Warm regards! Title: Re: A Good Weekend Post by: bb12 on April 08, 2013, 12:20:47 AM thanks guys!
feels like real progress now Title: Re: A Good Weekend Post by: Surnia on April 08, 2013, 12:22:48 AM |iiii
Yes this is progress. I am happy with you. Title: Re: A Good Weekend Post by: Cumulus on April 08, 2013, 08:20:40 AM Bb. Heart warming, inspiring and happy thoughts. I think I underestimated the amount of work it would take to get there. At the beginning thought, he's gone, I'm OK. Then, well he's gone why aren't I OK. Reading your post is a great reminder what hard work and time can accomplish. Hope that was the first of many many wonderful weekends.
Title: Re: A Good Weekend Post by: heartandwhole on April 08, 2013, 11:36:17 AM bb12, thank you for this inspiring post
I can relate, although I am at one year and one week of breakup and NC I am starting to feel good about myself again. The other day I realized that I like myself lol I haven't had that feeling for a long time. Things have definitely changed for the better - I am rising out of the ashes, and better for it! Best wishes to you for continued positive changes and thanks for sharing Title: Re: A Good Weekend Post by: Maryiscontrary on April 08, 2013, 11:55:56 AM Wow, you guys inspire me.
Title: Re: A Good Weekend Post by: maria1 on April 08, 2013, 01:13:35 PM Beautifully expressed BB12
I am very happy for you. You deserve good things. |iiii Title: Re: A Good Weekend Post by: laelle on April 08, 2013, 01:29:29 PM I was so used to giving myself up completely to my exBPD that I did not really save anything for myself.
It's a lovely feeling to be protective of myself and my new emerging world and to have no urge to give it all away willy nilly. Beautifully said and so very true. Its nice to be able to look things in the eye now and say "nope, thats not for me" "That wont make me happy" Title: Re: A Good Weekend Post by: AnotherPhoenix on April 08, 2013, 01:53:53 PM Tremendous progress, BB12!
Congratulations! AnotherPheonix |iiii Title: Re: A Good Weekend Post by: dharmagems on April 08, 2013, 03:08:21 PM Happiness fills me. Hearing you, I bringing in my body, and home, and heart that there is hope for my recovery. I would like to trust myself more after all the shame and loss, and you bring me inspiration that I can start trusting myself more. All the love and warmth, dharmagems |