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Title: Mirrored ? Post by: apple on April 11, 2013, 09:53:53 AM I have my exw programmed into my phone under a different name than her given and it changes it for email also since they are linked. She noticed this in an email that I replied to a few weeks back since I didn't switch it up when I replied, and has now changed my contact to the same thing. The name is not nasty or mean, but it does feel like mirroring to me on some level.
Am I being mirrored ? Title: Re: Mirrored ? Post by: seeking balance on April 11, 2013, 11:14:06 AM I have my exw programmed into my phone under a different name than her given and it changes it for email also since they are linked. She noticed this in an email that I replied to a few weeks back since I didn't switch it up when I replied, and has now changed my contact to the same thing. The name is not nasty or mean, but it does feel like mirroring to me on some level. Am I being mirrored ? could be does that bother you? Title: Re: Mirrored ? Post by: apple on April 11, 2013, 11:50:14 AM It doesn't bother me in and of itself. In the past, before I was aware i wouldnt have looked at it the way i do now. The only concern I would have is if this could be viewed as a possible precursor of an attempted recycle. Things are starting to look really good for myself career wise and financially and she knows about it. It has taken me a long time to get to this point as my life was completely derailed on so many levels... . emotionally, financially
Title: Re: Mirrored ? Post by: seeking balance on April 11, 2013, 11:53:56 AM The only concern I would have is if this could be viewed as a possible precursor of an attempted recycle. This is likely one of the biggest myths on these boards - it is only a recycle if you go back. Most of the time, pwBPD are in the moment and reacting, not some premeditated "come back." If you are done, you won't go back, you won't open the door - you will be done. are you still vulnerable to her? Title: Re: Mirrored ? Post by: apple on April 11, 2013, 12:09:55 PM In some way I guess I am concerned that i am slightly vulnerable. I am to a point where i am mostly detached but probably not fully. I am more detched now than when she love bombed me - recycled last time.
Thank you Title: Re: Mirrored ? Post by: seeking balance on April 11, 2013, 12:21:52 PM In some way I guess I am concerned that i am slightly vulnerable. I am to a point where i am mostly detached but probably not fully. I am more detched now than when she love bombed me - recycled last time. Thank you Well, if I were you - I would decide my clear boundaries around communication - know your "week" spots and make sure you don't let her in those areas. Title: Re: Mirrored ? Post by: apple on April 11, 2013, 12:53:14 PM I use LC and keep conversation about the kids. 95% of all communication is email and text. On the few occasions where we are speaking in person she always tries to talk about my life and I am Kurt in my replies. I never ask about her or initiate any conversation.
Title: Re: Mirrored ? Post by: seeking balance on April 11, 2013, 01:25:01 PM I use LC and keep conversation about the kids. 95% of all communication is email and text. On the few occasions where we are speaking in person she always tries to talk about my life and I am Kurt in my replies. I never ask about her or initiate any conversation. |iiii My guess is you are not as vulnerable as you may feel - you are DOING the right things to not reengage personally. Without you discussing your life or asking about hers, it is going to be very hard for her to have anything to emotionally hook you. Keep up the good work! |