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Talking with her sister today. Her sister was frank with me. said she cared about me and so she wanted to warn me. She said that all the I love you's and miss yous and calls aren't genuine, she just wants something from me. She said if it were genuine she wouldn't be seeing everything she sees.

She then goes on about how shes been sleeping around with TONS of guys for drugs / alcohol / money. And she just contracted an STD from one of her meth buddies. Basically said all she's been doing is using her body for drugs. Wow how far has she fallen.

She told me she missed her court date and picked up a warrant. This is for a felony case. There is now a felony pending for another domestic violence against her sister. DA is looking at putting her in prison for 3 years now since she failed probation right out of rehab and wracking up so many violations.

Pretty sad really to see her throw her life away like this for drugs. I understand its her way of self soothing. But I think she is damaged beyond hope and I need to just walk away now. Makes me wonder if anything the past 1 1/2 years was genuine or real at all though.

You were real.   That is always worthwhile.

As long as we're breathing there is Hope. No one can measure the depth of anothers bottom. Shes falling and falling fast and all anyone can do is pray that she survives and finds it in herself to seak help.

What happened between you two was real, as real as it gets. She was as genuine as her disease would allow.

Pray for her, she needs it. 

Like blecker said, it was genuine and real. That may have been the problem, it was TOO genuine and real. Some BPD's believe they don't deserve a good person, and will go out of their way to prove it. It's so illogical and heartbreaking to think that you've given these people all your heart has to offer and more, but it drives them away or to bad behavior out of their own lack of self-esteem. They feel they cannot be loved, even though they may really, truly have loved you in return. I'm going through a similar situation with my ex right now where I believe that was the case. Such an amazing girl, so sweet and kind to me, yet she can't see how deserving of being loved she is, so she ran off to find a guy that will end up treating her like meat I bet. Walking away may be the best thing because no matter how hard you try, this person may never be able to get over their own inner demons about how they feel about themselves. You can give them the world, but they will never be able to accept it.