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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Conflicted About Continuing, Divorcing/Custody, Co-parenting => Topic started by: crazylife on April 26, 2013, 10:47:15 AM



Title: Ever just want to scream and throw things?
Post by: crazylife on April 26, 2013, 10:47:15 AM
I woke up this morning and just feel crappy about my life. I do have a plan but it is taking time and today I feel like it isnt moving at all. I am not a screamer or yeller, last time was 18 years ago. But sometimes I just wake up and think it might be worth it, to just scream it out... . I am sick of being alone despite being married. I am a major extrovert. I am sick of no sex life... . been 3 years,  and sick of my life revolving around having to not be myself to keep the peace,Despite things improving using DBT and SET. I was so happy to get improvement initially but the newness has worn off.

I am sure tomorrow will be better but today really sucks  :'(

My kids are coming in this weekend for a family reunion, but that presents a whole different set of problems. ( trying to cope ahead another DBT skill )


Title: Re: Ever just want to scream and throw things?
Post by: funkenstein91 on April 26, 2013, 10:58:43 AM
I think it was a year or so ago that my BPDgf was screaming at me about never taking her to do anything and being a cheap ass and a ton of other stuff like that the moment she got home from work. I walked into our bedroom, pulled out a dresser drawer, and threw it against a wall breaking it. I think that's the only time in my life I gave into my anger in such a way. It honestly didn't help at all. It just frightened me. I couldn't believe how bad things had gotten.

Screaming, on the other hand, has relieved a lot of frustration in the past. If you can do it in a way that your partner won't here it, I highly recommend trying it out from time to time to see if it helps calm you down a bit.


Title: Re: Ever just want to scream and throw things?
Post by: crazylife on April 26, 2013, 01:20:49 PM
I really just have to fantasize about screaming. If I ever were to cut loose I would be totally at my own mercy. It sort of feeds on itself and by the time I can quit it takes about 3 days to calm down. Hence my last one 18 years ago. I think for just once it would be so nice if I were considered. I know that is another fantasy, just sayin'