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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship => Topic started by: ComoLu on May 27, 2013, 01:51:05 AM



Title: pwBPD self-awareness
Post by: ComoLu on May 27, 2013, 01:51:05 AM
I was reading a post the other day about whether or not pwBPD's are aware that there is something wrong when they have moments of clarity, so I wanted to share a recent experience.  I think my uxBPDH is aware all the time that something is wrong, but he can't or won't admit it.  He seeks control over me by deciding how we will communicate.  We are selling a house together, so I cannot go NC. 

He will not answer the phone when I call.  He told me in an email, "... . I won’t answer your phone calls.  If there is an emergency then you can leave a voicemail laying out the specifics of the emergency, and  I will not respond to any more of your emails that are not on topic."  He also will not respond to emails in after about 6 p.m. (I suspect because that is when he starts drinking seriously).

When I told him that he needed to let our realtor know about his "communication rules" because they might impact our ability to respond to an offer, he flatly refused.  He seems to be well aware that his ridiculous rules would seem odd to her, so he doesn't want her to know because she might suspect something was wrong with him.

I truly believe he is fully aware that something is wrong all of the time.  I think that is why he drinks.  Have any of you had this experience?  Are they fully aware or only aware in moments of clarity.