BPDFamily.com

I would like to hear from parents who have had their BPD child in an rtc.

• How old is your child when he/she went in?
  
               

• How long did he/she stay at the rtc?
  
               

• At the beginning, did your child want to go?
  
               

• After a while did your child "get with the program"?
  
             

• After how many months do you feel that your child started to 'get with the program'?             

• After your child was discharged from the program (a year or more later) did your child improve significantly?
  
               

• Did the results last for any length of time?
  
               

• Did your BPD child slip back (emotionally and functionally) to the low point where he/she was before they went in to the rtc?
  
               

• If there is any other pertinent information that you would like to share, please feel free to do so!
  
             

I would like to hear from parents who have had their BPD child in an rtc.

• How old is your child when he/she went in?
  
  16

• How long did he/she stay at the rtc?
  
  14 months followed by a therapuetic foster care home for 7 more months

• At the beginning, did your child want to go?
  
  No[/color

• After a while did your child "get with the program"?
  
  She faked her way thru it

• After how many months do you feel that your child started to 'get with the program'?Conutined to fake

• After your child was discharged from the program (a year or more later) did your child improve significantly?
  
  No

• Did the results last for any length of time?
  
  It is years later that we have seen some positive results from all her different treatment programs

• Did your BPD child slip back (emotionally and functionally) to the low point where he/she was before they went in to the rtc?
  
  It is years later that we have seen some positive results from all her different treatment programs

• If there is any other pertinent information that you would like to share, please feel free to do so!

I will give you my two cents but my dd is 16... . 

• How old is your child when he/she went in?
  
  15             

• How long did he/she stay at the rtc?
  
  2 months             

• At the beginning, did your child want to go?
  
  NO             

• After a while did your child "get with the program"?
  
  some what... .  did run away from the place.           

• After how many months do you feel that your child started to 'get with the program'?she was there for a short amount of time... .  she really needed a longer stay... .  I feel after she ran away she got with the program but she needed more             

• After your child was discharged from the program (a year or more later) did your child improve significantly?
  
  yes my daughter is better since being in the RTC... .  we have had a pretty good summer... .  not prefect but she is not SI and has not run away, no drug or alcohol... .  got her license and trying for a job. She has only been out for the summer               

• Did the results last for any length of time?
  
  too soon to tel               

• Did your BPD child slip back (emotionally and functionally) to the low point where he/she was before they went in to the rtc?
  
  too soon to tell             

• If there is any other pertinent information that you would like to share, please feel free to do so!
  
  We are giving our daughter the opportunity to go to a new school this year and a chance for her to use new coping skills. We are here to support her the best we can with therapy, group therapy and family therapy. I do have a plan B if things go really bad but I feel we need to try to approach things a bit differently and see if we get a different result. I have spent the summer reading Valerie Porr's book overcoming BPD and she does not think RTC or hospitals are where pwBPD belong but I understand when we are not able to keep our dd safe at home that is certainly a place we will consider. My dd and our family are still learning new skills and I for one am very determined to do everything under my power to help and support my dd. One thing that I worry about is that I will run out of time... .  once she is 18 I will not be able to send her away but since she just turned 16 this month I am willing to try and see if things are better.
  
  Someday... .  how old is your child again... .  I think if you can find an adult program for her then you should let her go if she will. I think if we are dealing with a person that should have reached a cetain maturity level but continues to practice poor coping skills then they need a higher level of care. I am sorry I can't remember all the details of you story but I know I have read many of your posts. I wishing you luck and I just wanted to give you my perspective on things... .  I hope it helped a bit... .                

How old is your child when he/she went in?   13      

How long did he/she stay at the rtc?        8 months       

At the beginning, did your child want to go?

  Not really.  DD was in a psych hospital placement and stated that she did not feel safe going home.  Asked to not go home so the decision was made to go to RTC.  Not real sure she realized what she was asking for, but we were in agreement with the team that it was the best option. 

After a while did your child "get with the program"?

    yes but she is a good charmer and was able to  "fake" things for a while until staff really got to know her games     

After how many months do you feel that your child started to 'get with the program'?  1 ?            

After your child was discharged from the program (a year or more later) did your child improve significantly?  We are just at the one year anniversary.  Things were great for the first three months... almost too good.  Daughter stopped taking meds and refuses therapy.  She is a train wreck waiting to crash right now.

Did the results last for any length of time?     3 months             

Did your BPD child slip back (emotionally and functionally) to the low point where he/she was before they went in to the rtc? YES!

If there is any other pertinent information that you would like to share, please feel free to do so!

Placement was the right decision and we did see some changes in our dd.  She has chosen to not work with the resources she has and it hitting bottom again.  Unfortunately she is old enough to  make decisions so unless we are in crisis mode again,there is not much we can do but "enjoy the ride".  [/quote]

I would like to hear from parents who have had their BPD child in an rtc.

How old is your child when he/she went in?

14

           

How long did he/she stay at the rtc?

5 months

           

At the beginning, did your child want to go?

Absolutely, she campaigned for it. She hated us and our rules. We also reacted badly to a self-injury incident at home not knowing better at the time. She also had a friend she heard about going away to a RTC, it registered in her subconscious


           

After a while did your child "get with the program"?

Yes, after 3 months she had a low point meltdown and ended up being taken from RTC for a hospitalization. They allowed her to return thank God (and after detoxing from some awful meds and put on Lamictal by the hospital psych) she did a total turn around and worked as hard as she could, though it was to be not good enough for the RTC to earn some privileges and pass to the further stages


         

After your child was discharged from the program (a year or more later) did your child improve significantly?

Yes for about 18 months it did, but now we are dealing with some relapse issues. We are on an upswing again. We had good family therapy through her RTC and DD realized that we loved her, she loved us, and home was not such a bad place. She hated the RTC and was very happy to come home

           

Did your BPD child slip back (emotionally and functionally) to the low point where he/she was before they went in to the rtc?

She still presents symptoms periodically, but we all learned what to do to not make it worse. So I guess I can say she never slipped back that far. We have had  number of police calls and ER visits, but we won't allow her to be admitted, so she's learned she can't escape her life that way again. We get back to normal life environs very, very quickly.

           

If there is any other pertinent information that you would like to share, please feel free to do so!

For us, RTC was good and bad at the same time. Her family therapy was great. Her individual therapy, she hated. In the real world if you hate your therapist after 5 months, you don't continue with that person. In RTC, you have no choice. As with anyplace there are some really good people, and some who are not good at their jobs. DD has attentional issues which make the rigors of a DBT program very, very difficult. She was severe ADHD, which the RTC would not acknowledge, or give her support for things such as remembering to do her DBT homework or diary card. She did not complete the program. At the end it was like she was getting a B+ improved from an F, but only A's would be allowed to pass her to the next level. They have to have statistical standards, and DD could not meet them. She hit the learning curve, and we took her out when we realized she had hit the point of diminishing returns. It was spring, we found a new school, a summer job, and there was NO way she was going to be anything but discouraged by staying at that point. When she went in, we got a break from the trauma. But we still have some post-trauma from that awful time period. Almost 3 years later, it is STILL surreal. She was too ill then to live at home, no doubt. We had another child already traumatized by her behaviors. But we all still have sadness that she was away. The average self injury addiction lasts 5-10 years. She now goes longer between periods of self-harm, but it still rears it's ugly head, though she sincerely has tried to swear it off. It IS a physical addiction. We still deal with stealing, lying, defiance, and failing in school issues. DESPITE all of that, she is healthier at home, with us and our LOVE, and in the real world. Would I recommend RTC? Well, we have a younger child who also has challenges. We are NOT allowing her to go down that same path that would take her so far out of her school and community. It's SO hard to reacclimatize. With more intensive care, they will go ahead and play the part, and it's harder to get back to the real world once they step out.