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I can’t help to notice how many song I listen to, and the words seem to say what I was/still do, feel about the relationship. Or maybe they just fit well as what went on in these type relationships? Are the song writers living this experience too, being able to come up with these lyrics?  Some of the songs I like and listen to, are listed. Warning if you still real fresh coming out of a relationship, you might want to skip listening to them. In no particular order. “How sweet is to be loved by you” by James Taylor. “You were always on my mind” by Willie Nelson. “Angel flying to close to the ground” by Willie Nelson. “ The first cut is the deepest” by Cat Stevens. “Heartbreak warfare”. By John Myer. “I’ll take care of you” by Rihanna Ft Drake. “Somebody that I use to know” by Gotye. “ How to save a life” by Fray. “Hot N Cold” by katy Perry. “One more night” by Maroon 5.  “A thousand year”  by Christina Perri.

My song that I like as my revengeful song is “ If you think your lonely now” by  Bobby Womack.

Hey I’m still healing; I know she went from living in a castle to a rundown trailer in living conditions. This song helps me to heal.

What some of your favorite’s songs?

I know what you mean, most songs fit the BPD relationship. So lately I listen to slow tempo music without words.

Here's some ones I like to remind me of the crappy things that happened to me.

Mike Posner "Halo" r&b

ATB "Twisted Love (vocal mix)" electronic I think this is about BPD all the way

Now that I'm further along with the healing, a couple (reflection songs) I listen to to keep my spirits up are... .

Headstrong -Trapt

Cry Lonely - Cross Canadian Ragweed

Not sure BPD was the inspiration behind them, but they can relate in their own way.

Hey these are some great song too. "Headstrong" I never hear before, It might get on my fav list now. lol     

Hi Family Members!

     I'm so glad you posted on this.  My big one is "The Long and Winding Road" by the Beatles.  It starts out in a very unclear way structurally, you don't know if it's at the beginning or the middle of the song, almost as if to say this is a cycle and it doesn't matter where you come in.  Then it goes on to say (among other really telling things about BPD) it 'always leads me back', it 'always leads me here' and begs not to be left waiting like he always is since 'a long, long time ago'. Paul had said that writing the song helped keep him from seeing a psychiatrist (as much). 

     To me it's a classic recycling, unsatisfying r/s that smells a lot like BPD although the disorder wasn't actually even described at the time the song was written.  My guess is that it describes the r/s with John, actually.  Sounds weird, but their r/s was closer than many biological family r/s are and they were both well known to be victims of parental abandonment (especially John).  Anyway, that's my theory.  I haven't tried playing the song backwards or anything.   :)

LT

     

'Your time is gonna come' by Led Zeppelin; to me, it's a clear BPD reference.

Songs always speak to us more when we're emotional.  My advice to anyone who is down is to avoid the sad ones, stick to happy songs, or even don't listen to them at all.  Watch sit-coms, stand-up shows, things that will make you laugh.  It's important to keep laughing as well as crying.

OH MUSIC! the good and bad of it all! lol

Mine are a little more literal. If I am ruminating, "cowboys and angels" Like daggers that one. Or "The dance". he plays guitar and we both sing so that was one we did together. Another one is "purple". I really like that one.

To feel better... . "I get a little bit stronger" or to get up beat and over it... "blow me one last kiss".

There are quite a few but those immediately come to mind. nothing philisophical about them. They just fit.

Lao Tzu, That a great one, I wonder if that's how the song writer write songs like that. Actually living with it themselves or someone they know.

As mentioned before, if your new to BPD issues and your emotional wounds are still to fresh, some of the song will be to painful to listen to. So just don't do it. Peace   

 A song I grew up listening to back when I was 18 or so for some reason came to my mind. Just started singing it. Genesis - "Throwing It All Away"  Wow that was weird how that one floated into my brain matter. I haven't heard that one for years. but the word fit well how I feel. 

"This Love" by Maroon 5, really sums up a BPD relationship well.

"I was so high I did not recognize

The chaos that controlled my mind"

Yes, I was so elevated/swept away by the idealization phase that I my mind really was controlled by chaos.

"This love has taken its toll on me

She said Goodbye too many times before"

Yup, exactly! My ex would break up with me and get back together every could of days. It would devastate me. Every time she would leave, I would feel like my life was over.

Hide your love away- the Beatles.

    The person singing this song shows signs of a BPD breakup. Feeling two foot small. How could I even try I can never win. He feels the shame. I can see them laugh at me each and every day.



The Cave-Mumford and Son

This song is a must for me. Kind of sums up the whole picture.

Written in very deep allegory. The dude is done! Like me. The whole cannibal reference. They consume us. The reference to walking away from feelings and mistakes instead of dealing with them. Love this tune. The major lyric. "So come out of your cave walking on you hands see the world hanging upside down you will understand dependence in the makers land" everything seems backward and skew to souls tormented with mental problems. The dependence they will not understand in this lifetime.  Yes that one is a keeper.

    And finally he gives up and walks away to live his own life. Very inspiring to me.

If there were a prize in this thread I might win... .

THE ACID QUEEN    by    The Who

check out the lyrics to that mother!

Here is a thing that I wrote before I was even aware of BPD. It's part of how I use healthy outlets ... . The writing.       



     PERFIDY

I looked it in the eyes and called it what it was

Deceit and trickery and it said because

It's all your fault that

I am the way I am

And you must suffer

And grow accustomed to your pain

I searched inside my self and found me again

The things I have and the people I love

All helped me to rise above

The horror and hell that I had with you

And I chose it myself but never knew

disguised as love but as deadly as sin

I accepted you and gave from within

destroyed by my own trust and respect

By giving and caring who would suspect

That kindness and compassion would bring terrible shame

Suffering and torture like skin to flame

Perfidy is your name.

I was doing some reading on this site and came across a song the they had playing in the background. It's a song by The Cure called " Just Like Heaven" great dance music but. The version by Katie Melua is a bit more low key, For me listening to the acoustic instrumental is soothing to the soul. OK guy's give me a break I'm an old man. lol

Lets not forget the song "Borderline" by Madonna.  :)

Borderline, feels like I'm going to lose my mind You just keep on pushing my love over the borderline Borderline, feels like I'm going to lose my mind You just keep on pushing my love over the borderline, borderline

Keep on pushing me baby Don't you know you drive me crazy You just keep on pushing my love over the borderline

Something in your eyes is makin' such a fool of me When you hold me in your arms you love me till I just can't see

But then you let me down, when I look around Baby, you just can't be found Stop driving me away, I just wanna stay

Read more: MADONNA - BORDERLINE LYRICS

":)on't let the sun go down on me" Definitely struck a chord with my emotions at the time.

I can't light no more of your darkness

All my pictures seem to fade to black and white

I'm growing tired and time stands still before me

Frozen here on the ladder of my life

Too late to save myself from falling

I took a chance and changed your way of life

But you misread my meaning when I met you

Closed the door and left me blinded by the light

Don't let the sun go down on me

Although I search myself, it's always someone else I see

I'd just allow a fragment of your life to wander free

But losing everything is like the sun going down on me

Undone,

I have heard and loved this song for years. I never really read the lyrics. Reading them brought a few tears. Thank you for sharing.

Hi there!

Mine was "Invisible" by Alexa Ray Joel.  I actually created a post about it. 

Here it is:  https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?topic=202447.0