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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship => Topic started by: Trick1004 on August 02, 2013, 02:22:48 AM



Title: Not exactly a run in but almost with the ex, feedback?
Post by: Trick1004 on August 02, 2013, 02:22:48 AM
So tonight my brother called me up to hang out at a bar a couple blocks where I live from for some darts and ping pong. Everything was cool, we went out to smoke a cig and were chatting it up. We both noticed someone come around the block and immediately turn back around. We weren't sure who it was but something in me and I guess my brother too knew it was my ex.

A couple minutes later I got a text from my ex asking how long I would be at the bar for cause she was there to see some people knew, I didn't respond. About ten minutes after that I got another text from her saying "never mind I'm going home". I also didn't respond to that one either.

I will say when I saw that person walk around the corner of the bar I was at I immediately knew it was her and when the text came a minute later it just confirmed it. It threw me in a loop.

I considered texting her back that I would be leaving soon.

I considered, hey maybe we can talk.

I considered just dealing with her being there.

I ended up doing nothing and got a text from her (which I didn't respond to) saying "never mind, i'm going home."

I continued on with my evening with my brother playing ping pong and have to say that not responding to her felt very empowering.


Title: Re: Not exactly a run in but almost with the ex, feedback?
Post by: NiceGuy83 on August 02, 2013, 02:37:37 AM
Good for you, buddy.  Sticking to NC is really really hard, but once you start being able to do it, even when they turn up out of the blue, you're on the road to getting over her.


Title: Re: Not exactly a run in but almost with the ex, feedback?
Post by: Surnia on August 02, 2013, 02:49:48 AM
Trick1004

|iiii

Cool, that you could just continue what you did before she texted to you: Playing with your brother.

The good thing is not only maintain NC, it is also not taking responsibility for her visiting the same bar or not... .


Title: Re: Not exactly a run in but almost with the ex, feedback?
Post by: Trick1004 on August 02, 2013, 12:36:53 PM
Thanks for the feedback,

I was pretty drunk and still a bit shooken up when I wrote this last night. Feeling better today and am glad I handled it the way I did.