BPDFamily.com

The ex called again tonight. 43 days nc still. My question is do you think that the fact that she's getting or already got married yet still calls me a pretty obvious indicator of BPD? She's not diagnosed but come on... I tell her I need nc and add that to her getting married and she still tries to talk to me... I've never been painted black prob cus I ended it. She wants something outta me... a new rescuer?

I would be a bit wondering too.

Did you take the call?

Nope. Funny thing was that I was on a date when she called. I haven't responded to the 12 or so calls, numerous texts and emails since going NC 43 days ago. As far as I know she is still getting married or already married... but she obviously is missing me or how I made her feel or just the triangulation. I really do think she loves me but because of that it triggers her BPD so bad. She'd often say that I reminded her of her dad (who left the family in her teens)... well if that's the case, then I probably trigger her a lot more than most... but then she is also probably drawn to me more than most because I remind her of a father that she probably always wanted to be there for her. Sad.

Yes, it is sad. And sort of coincidence with the date.

I think this is what you can do: Feel the sadness for a moment, knowing you cannot do anything for her and move on with your life. 

How was the date btw?

It was ok. Honestly, I haven't met anyone that I've clicked with nearly as good as the exBPD. My exBPD was pretty much my first love so that's what makes this so hard... I don't really have a normal relationship to compare things to.

You could block her number, text and calls. Shuts it all down so you won't have to deal with it. Would you want to really be involved with a married woman who behaves this way?

I messaged her sister to delete my number from my ex's phone. I just checked my ex's facebook for the first time in awhile and its a bunch of those portrait pre-wedding pics where they look all happy lol. It's easy to see past the bs when you have your ex post pics like that but then call you a few nights later. The great thing about NC is that I'm far less attached now than ever before. I mainly just get mad. She's severely damaged and any normal person getting married/already married wouldn't be calling ex's at 9 at night the same month they got married. I'm not sad... I'm angry now.

Just talked with my exBPD's sister a little bit. She said she would try to stop my ex from calling me. After talking to her for about 10 min about things, I can't help but feel someone sadder. Maybe it's because I hadn't really talked to anyone (besides this site) about her in a long time. I guess this is what would have happened on an even greater scale if I had have broke NC. Definitely going to the gym today...