BPDFamily.com

Hi I thought I would share this with you, after an awful day of raging, smashing up the house and throwing things at me I have been advised by people on here to take photos as evidence in case I ever need them.  I didn't want to have them on my camera roll but have found an iPhone app called Keep Safe, this enables you to take photos and store them in a PIN protected folder, they never go on the camera roll so no chance of anyone accidentally coming across them.

So if anyone is in a situation like me you may find it useful.

Good tip. Its not a question of if you will ever need the photos, but WHEN you will need the photos. If i had taken a few more photos I would have less trouble in my life now.

Here's another tip... .

If you have a laptop computer sitting on your coffee table, install sound recording software (Audacity is a free program) and let it record. If you don't capture anything, delete it. If you capture a rage, keep it for when you need it. The police are never going to believe you over that sweet little BPD partner of yours. Had I done this I would not be in court right now and she would have been exposed as the violent predator that she is.

I have long used Evernote on my iPad to record H's rages.  He, too, is able to convince certain people (like his atty) that he's the "nicest guy in the world."   However, when we were in Discovery Phase of our divorce, when his atty got to hear those recordings, she realized what she was really dealing with and told him that the judge would not be kind to him.  We live in a state where, in a Contested Divorce (I had filed a charge of Mental Cruelty, Alcoholism), the judge will award substantial assets to the victim spouse. 

That said, since we've reconciled, H has behaved quite well.  I am using SET, and when I know that we're going to have a stressful day (lots of work to do or whatever), I give H a gentle "heads up" by saying something like, "Now, today we have a lot to do and there will be times when we will feel stressed.  Let's not take it out on each other, ok?"  That little trick seems to work.  When H starts to feel stressed, then he'll say, "you warned me that today would be stressful and it has been."  And I'll say, "let's sit and relax a bit."  Then we do, and then continue with the work.