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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship => Topic started by: Aussie0zborn on September 05, 2013, 03:25:08 PM



Title: I Don't LikeThe Way That You Think
Post by: Aussie0zborn on September 05, 2013, 03:25:08 PM
How many times have you heard, "I don't like the way that you think"? I thought these lines were particular to my uBPDexwife but I've seen this same line quoted here a few times.

When I left her before the recycle I took everything I had paid for, including the water filter on the kitchen sink. I was surprised it didn't leak or need a plug. Apparently it did leak. Once recycled I was told the house had flooded but with no damage to the carpet it would have been just a small puddle on the tiled kitchen floor.  During the devaluation period at the end of the marriage she accused me of purposely flooding the house back then. I said,

"If I wanted to flood the house I would have taken the roof off like that guy in the newspaper last year". Rather stunned she said, "how do you do that". I answered, "with a cordless drill". Her answer : "I don't like the way that you think!"

At about the same time she was telling me about a woman's suspicious behavior. Before she could finish I said, "oops, someone's having an affair" and again I heard, "I don't like the way you think". I said, "hang on, you just said that she did this, that and the other, correct?" "She is DEFINITELY having an affair" and ofcourse she raged at my thought process. A week later we find out my wife is having an affair, too. No wonder she didn't like the way I think.

What's your worst thoughtcrime?


Title: Re: I Don't LikeThe Way That You Think
Post by: Want2know on September 05, 2013, 03:33:48 PM
Why do you think that she said this, in general?

Hearing others experiences may help you understand that others may have experienced this, but more importantly, do you know why she was saying this statement, at times?


Title: Re: I Don't LikeThe Way That You Think
Post by: Moonie75 on September 05, 2013, 03:41:21 PM
Want2know,

Is it possible that when our thoughts 'appear' to be a whacky as theirs, that it scares them that we might be able to read their projections & read that what they're accusing us of is actually as good as a confession from them?

I certainly got the impression that when I got tuned in to my ex's bizarre statements, that she really worried I could read her, sins 'n' all!



Title: Re: I Don't LikeThe Way That You Think
Post by: Want2know on September 05, 2013, 04:03:25 PM
To me it seemed that she possibly felt he was pushing her buttons with his responses, and it's a defensive/judgmental statement on her part.

I'm not sure it's necessarily a BPD type statement, though.  That's why I wanted to ask why he felt she said this, as I think there is a deeper question lurking there.


Title: Re: I Don't LikeThe Way That You Think
Post by: Aussie0zborn on September 05, 2013, 07:04:51 PM
In general, I think she would say "I don't like, the way that you think" when she was gaslighting or manipulating me and it wasn't working.

The house never flooded. I know the strike / counter trike thing is not productive but we were in the last days of devaluation. She was planning her revenge after convincing herself I never ever loved her and was just stringing her along. Sinister thoughts like this in my mind scared her as it showed I might not be so easy to pay back. That's how I read it.

Is it possible that when our thoughts 'appear' to be a whacky as theirs, that it scares them that we might be able to read their projections & read that what they're accusing us of is actually as good as a confession from them?

I certainly got the impression that when I got tuned in to my ex's bizarre statements, that she really worried I could read her, sins 'n' all!

Agreed. . Their attempt to project, gaslight or manipulate has failed hence the response of "I don't like the way that you think" as at this point they know they are not going to pull the wool over your eyes.

I didn't see this as a BPD thing, just as a manipulative thing but I've seen that statement here at last twice and it got me wondering. Has anybody else been subjected to it?