BPDFamily.com

Several weeks ago I ran into a you tube clip from a women from Flanders or Holland who had recovered from BPD.  It was in dutch and interesting.  I reacted to it saying that she was more brave then my ex partner (didn't mention her name or so or any reference to her identity at all), who was still in denial, and that it was good to see that there was hope for people with BPD.

Yesterday evening I posted on Google+ that I hadn't been this happy in years.  I don't post a lot on it except some of my you tube material and a little status, but that's it.

Today I get a reaction on my reaction on the You Tube clip.  From my ex partner.  That she has no BPD, that it is another humiliation she has to suffer from me, therapist can say what he wants, that I'm saying this because I have lost her, that I have to let go of her, that all the stress she got was because of me, and I have to leave her alone.

All it did was put a smile on my face, make a move with my head, thinking how is it possible.

As nobody can see my You Tube history, she had or been looking for information on borderline, or she has been googling me all over... .

She even now says : it's me he's talking about, in public... .  She knows she's not getting back in my life, so she's projecting again.  As I don't want her back, it is now her who doesn't want me back instead.

By reacting she is seeking desperately contact again.  And it is I who have to leave her alone.  Another projection... .

I think she must have seen my google+ account as well having read that I feel so good.  And that this has triggered her reaction.  She has several google+ accounts.  So I don't care to block them or to bother looking how many she has actually... .

She has no stress anymore, all the stress came from me, but she's interested in every move I make... .

It's such a bad bad world, I'm the bad bad wolf   

It just shows how badly the borderline creates an unrealistic world in their mind.

The contradiction.

In words.

And behavior.

So maddening.


In bold.

That.

My exUBPDgf stalked me online when she left me first time.

Even sent me screen shots she had taken from her iPhone of stuff I was posting on Facebook from one of her fake accounts(I had her blocked at the time)... .

Based on this... .

It would not be far fetched to think she may be doing same thing now.

Except.

I permanently closed my Facebook and Instagram accounts when she left me 2nd time.

She cannot track me.

I have received odd texts(one disguised as spam) and unrecognized phone numbers calling my cell since she left.

And her denial about her BPD... .

My ex admitted... .denied... .Admitted/denied... .

All in one sentence.

And then told me she was reading a self help book... .

As if that was going to help her.

Saddens me.

I tried.

My words no longer registered once the devaluation started.

In discard... .my words ceased to exist.

Hi Ironmanfalls

That is the most unreal thing of it all, one moment admitting they have a problem, the next one denying it completely.  Been there myself.

It is sad indeed, and this may sound hard, but it is their life, their denial, their choice.

We have a life of our own.  Mine can never be again one shared with my ex.  In any way.  She is out of it, and I'm really happy that way.  |iiii

Reg,

The reversal in position.

So corrosive... .Makes you question yourself.

As you said it, it makes you question yourself, and that is the goal of the defense mechanism in a way that they have.  Nothing personal, but the borderline behavior.  But corrosive and toxic indeed !

Questioning yourself is not always a bad thing, a borderline person can make or try you to have doubts about yourself.  But there's also other questioning.  As I mentioned in another thread here, a message of hope, and that kind of questioning has made me learn some valuable lessons about myself an my past.