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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship => Topic started by: Ripples on September 18, 2013, 04:37:03 AM



Title: Keeping us there
Post by: Ripples on September 18, 2013, 04:37:03 AM
Im now in a very lovely relationship and have recently had a beautiful baby girl.

Out of the blue comes a fb friends request 7 years after I left her madness.

Go figure!  :)


Title: Re: Keeping us there
Post by: Reg on September 18, 2013, 05:01:33 AM
Hi Ripples,

I do get the idea, that she knows about your current situation !

Reg


Title: Re: Keeping us there
Post by: Ripples on September 18, 2013, 05:42:20 AM
Hi Reg,

For sure she does. Being the cynic that I am I doubt its about wanting to share my happiness. More like how can I possibly be happy without her! What is she missing etc.


Title: Re: Keeping us there
Post by: Reg on September 18, 2013, 07:49:55 AM
I think you hit the nail spot on ! 

Nothing cynical about it.

She sees that you are actually happy now, that you've moved on and that things are going pretty good for you.

That probably gives her doubts, some kind of BPD jealousy, remembering her of what she had with you, and you might be in for a new attempt of a recycle.  You have become white.

I'd say keep her away as far as you can !


Title: Re: Keeping us there
Post by: Ripples on September 18, 2013, 08:36:31 AM
Im glad you agree Reg. I should say that she is living with someone and has two kids with him after a 6 year relationship. For sure there will be a "how could he possibly be happy... ." thing going on plus I think she will be theoretically putting herself into the position of my lovely partner... .what do you call that? Anyway... .the result im sure is "what have I thrown away!". Hope that makes sense.

Anyway, for me although the approach is veiled in friendship, I sense that is more motivated by jealousy and a desire to see what she threw away. Its like she wants to compare her life to mine. After so long, its nice to get another piece of the puzzle. Confirmation is such a good medicine for doubt!