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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Conflicted About Continuing, Divorcing/Custody, Co-parenting => Topic started by: simplyasiam on October 02, 2013, 11:46:43 AM



Title: over come by the stress of my own boundaries
Post by: simplyasiam on October 02, 2013, 11:46:43 AM
o3roug-13t0r3rhwfuwefhwehf kewbfqjkijnh  thats kind of how i feel inside my head. i dont know up from down at this point!


Title: Re: over come by the stress of my own boundaries
Post by: downandin on October 02, 2013, 12:10:14 PM
o3roug-13t0r3rhwfuwefhwehf kewbfqjkijnh  thats kind of how i feel inside my head. i dont know up from down at this point!

That pretty much sums it up for me too.


Title: Re: over come by the stress of my own boundaries
Post by: simplyasiam on October 02, 2013, 12:38:34 PM
are still with your bpr so?


Title: Re: over come by the stress of my own boundaries
Post by: ugghh on October 02, 2013, 03:28:19 PM
You can't tell up from down because that is the world we live in with a BPD.  They thrive in that environment.   For the nons it is hard for us to wrap our heads around it because we are expecting predictability, which they are inherently unable to give.  If you love them and affirm them that may lead to intimacy which scares the heck out of them.  If you set boundaries, they begin splitting because having an identity / needs that you need met, which means that you are not focused on them.  That of course means that you can't possibly love them, which triggers the abandonment fears.



Title: Re: over come by the stress of my own boundaries
Post by: simplyasiam on October 02, 2013, 03:42:29 PM
thank you ugghh, it must have triggered sometime, her contact went from everyday to nothing. i quess no way to know forsure what it she will do next.

in my mind she simply doesnt want the r/s and has moved on