BPDFamily.com

Children, Parents, or Relatives with BPD => Son, Daughter or Son/Daughter In-law with BPD => Topic started by: Mandz on October 19, 2013, 11:14:52 AM



Title: How best can this forum serve us to understand what to do and what not to do?
Post by: Mandz on October 19, 2013, 11:14:52 AM
HI,

I have finally reached a point where I need to know if there is anyone out there who can help me cope with what has been the most challenging thing in my life.  I have an adult child who has progressively got to the point where she has now been diagnosed with Bi Polar II and Traits of BPD.    We have helped her, supported her, paid for the best rehab facility in the country but still we have this emotional battle going on and a family in crisis.

How best can this forum serve us to understand what to do and what not to do?



Title: Re: Needing Information
Post by: GeekyGirl on October 19, 2013, 11:20:44 AM
Hi Mandz,

Welcome!   You've found the right place for support, as there are many other parents here supporting their children with BPD. I'm sorry that you're having a tough time with your daughter.

Is your daughter currently in treatment? What kinds of concerning behaviors are you seeing from her?

There's a wealth of information here, and you'll also be able to connect with other members who know what it's like to have a child with BPD. This is a good place to start: What can a parent do? (for parents of pwBPD) (https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?topic=114267.0).

How are you doing through this?

-GG


Title: Re: Needing Information
Post by: autumnfall on October 19, 2013, 11:47:39 PM
I'm tight with u mantz... .sounds like my past 18 months with myy now 18 yr old... I just joined this site today


Title: Re: Needing Information
Post by: lbjnltx on October 20, 2013, 12:02:07 AM
Hello Mandz,

Happy to have you here.

The information we share here is based on the most current, effective, clinical research and therapeutic models published and practiced by the leaders in the field of Borderline Personality Disorder.

As parents and members we support one another through validation of our experiences, modeling and teaching what has been effective and helpful in understanding the disorder, coping, communicating with our children, and finding appropriate treatment for them.

Our focus and objective for the parents is to improve the relationship between us and our children. 

Is this what you are looking for?

lbjnltx



Title: Re: How best can this forum serve us to understand what to do and what not to do?
Post by: Rapt Reader on October 21, 2013, 12:40:54 PM
Hi, Mandz & *welcome*

One of the hardest things in life is having a child with BPD, and not knowing what to do about it! We love them, hate their behaviors, and only want them to have a safe and happy life... .And, we want ourselves to have a safe and happy life also. lbjnltx is right; the information on this site is based on the most current and effective clinical research.

On the right side of the margin on this page are many links to information that can help you understand what to do and what not to do with your daughter. I am here because of my adult (36) son who was recently diagnosed with BPD. What I have found is that the information on this site about Validation, Radical Acceptance, and the communication tools of S.E.T. were life-changing for me and my family.

Although you can't change your daughter, once you understand better the way her mind works, and learn how to communicate with her in a way that doesn't press every one of her buttons, she will react differently to you. And there's a good chance that the emotional battles will end, and your family will be out of crisis. I am telling you the truth... .My own family does not suffer those battles anymore, and our crisis is over. I'm so happy you found us! Please tell us more of your story and ask your questions; it really will help 


Title: Re: How best can this forum serve us to understand what to do and what not to do?
Post by: peaceplease on October 21, 2013, 02:50:28 PM
Mandz,

Welcome to BPD family!  I am here because I have a daughter(age 29) that I highly suspect has BPD.  She has had other diagnosis in the past, a few times Bi-Polar was the diagnosis. 

As Rapt Reader directed you to the tools on the right.   It really does help to read about the communication tools.  Learning how to validate was a big helper in communicating with my daughter.  And, learning these communication techniques work well with everyone not just people with BPD.

I hope you find what you are seeking here.   There are many similar stories here among  member.  You will find support here.


peaceplease