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Title: Longest I've been with NC Post by: Eric1 on October 28, 2013, 04:13:35 PM 13 days today! That's the longest I've gone. I honestly thought she might have called over the weekend, but nothing. I've had weak moments today, but stayed strong. I told her not to contact me, so I can't break that now.
How do you cope with the fact that someone, in my case I still care for her, never contacting you again? Title: Re: Longest I've been with NC Post by: bewildered2 on October 28, 2013, 04:41:11 PM there is a very good chance that she will contact you again.
but there is also a chance that she will be stronger and more patient than you, and wait for you to contact her. the real question is what do you expect to get out of more contact with her? the sad fact seems to be that more contact results in more and deeper hurt. that was always my experience. is that what you want? b2 Title: Re: Longest I've been with NC Post by: DownandOut on October 28, 2013, 04:50:22 PM 13 days today! That's the longest I've gone. I honestly thought she might have called over the weekend, but nothing. I've had weak moments today, but stayed strong. I told her not to contact me, so I can't break that now. How do you cope with the fact that someone, in my case I still care for her, never contacting you again? I struggle with this daily. My high functioning uBPDexgf is extremely stubborn and proud. I was the one that broke off the relationship because I just couldn't take it anymore. I have way too much self-respect for what I was going through. Nevertheless, I sometimes wish she would contact me even if I ignored her because I would then feel like I was in a position of power (even though I'm not sure what I would do if she did). I know though that there is a strong possibility that I may never hear from her again and I hate the thought of that but I cannot heal and become a better person until I accept that. I don't know what the future holds, but a relationship, at least for me, requires 2 people willing to grow together and I cannot be in a relationship where I'm the only one trying to grow. That being said, although it hurts unbelievably knowing I may never again speak to the one time love of my life, the best I could do is focus on my own life and hope that I can find someone willing to love me the way I'm capable of loving them. Title: Re: Longest I've been with NC Post by: Eric1 on October 28, 2013, 06:04:22 PM What's helped is slowly realising that I don't think I could ever have a relationship with her again. There would be no trust, I wouldn't be able to set boundaries for fear of her upping and leaving again & I can't do with the rages. I still care for her, am attracted to her and miss her. But the cons outweigh the pros.
It's hard work. I just need to stay strong now. Title: Re: Longest I've been with NC Post by: Aussie0zborn on October 28, 2013, 07:58:24 PM Keep at it, Eric. I like your logic and you seem a lot stronger and wiser now than you did a week ago. Imagine what another 13 days can do for you.
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