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This Values Inventory Test is very thought-provoking and interesting. I took the test (took about 10 minutes and wasn't hard), and based on the results, I was given real help (that can be downloaded, saved and printed out) for positive changes in my life. Strategies for a Values-Centered Life, with values-based strategies for specific life issues, that I reviewed with my test results in mind.

Take the test here: [Requires email to register]

(https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/images/mb/more_info.gif) (http://www.lifevaluesinventory.org/)

What does the test tell you?

The test was developed by R. Kelly Crace, Ph.D. & Duane Brown, Ph.D. Crace is the director of Duke University’s Counseling and Psychological Services. He is a licensed psychologist, the co-author of the Life Values Inventory.  He received his academic and clinical training from Vanderbilt University, the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, and Duke University. He served as the director of the Counseling Center at the College of William & Mary. The Life Values Inventory Online was developed to help individuals and organizations clarify their values and serve as a blueprint for effective decision-making and optimal functioning.

I took this test.

Among the PDF's provided for me were topics such as Self-Leadership, Managing Life Transitions, Values & Relationships, Stress & Emotional Management and more. The paper that I found incredibly helpful for me, and eye-opening, was Stress Management; turns out, I tend to go into "fixing" mode during those times that I should be in "coping" mode. I really never thought about this before... .and I find that trying to fix things when I should be coping can cause me more stress instead of relieving it. Here is what the paper said:

Coping with Emotional Storms, Developing Resilience

and Healthy Emotional Self-Management. If you have done all the

problem-solving and action steps and are working well with your own self imposed

pressure but still feel over-stressed, then your task is all about

coping. You are currently feeling stressed because something upsetting is

going on, it is normal and worthy for you to be upset. The most typical

example is grief. We can be doing everything right in terms of stress

management but still feel awful when we are experiencing a devastating

loss. When we are in periods of our lives when we are reacting to events

beyond our control that are causing us emotional discomfort and pain,

sometimes the challenge isn’t to fix it but to cope and ride out the emotional

storm. There are many unhealthy ways for us to cope with emotional

storms, but there are only a few healthy ways to successfully navigate them.

Healthy Forms of Coping. First, we must accept that the limit to the

emotional intensity that we can stand is usually a self-imposed limit. We

choose to draw the line of what is acceptable and unacceptable. When we

get close to that self-imposed line, we shift into a mode where we are

compelled to do anything to make ourselves feel better. This is when we will

usually resort to unhealthy coping behaviors that have the power to quickly

distract us from the unacceptable emotion. Instead, to survive emotional

storms we must accept and respect that we are reacting to something that is

real in our lives and that it requires coping instead of fixing.

I found this Values Inventory Test and all related results and Strategies to be a valuable tool to helping me better know myself and grow emotionally and personally. This was an interesting and productive experience, and an important step in formulating and defending my boundaries. What have I learned?

If I find myself stressing out, I've probably put myself into "fixing" mode. And, I need to do what is right for me and use coping mechanisms instead.

I need the presence of mind to know when to stop being a fixer, and to become better at coping in the ways that make me happy.

There's nothing wrong with taking care of myself, and allowing myself the time it takes to cope with what is happening is a healthy thing.

It's not selfish to stop trying to fix everything. It's self-preservation, and that's OK.

It is interesting. I see that I have two prioritized conflicting values: creativity and responsibility - which is causes a lot of stress at work sometimes.

"Responsibility" was what I ranked #1 and this stuck out to me:

Stress occurs when people who value Responsibility become too other-oriented at the sacrifice of self-care and maintenance (responsibility to oneself). Stress is also experienced when role overload occurs to the point that it precludes or reduces the opportunity to act in a dependable fashion.

^That's totally me!  :)  I feel overloaded sometimes!


I also had 8 values in the "high priority" column which they said may be too many to focus on without conflict. Plus, I had "Concern for others" and "Independence" ranked as high priority, and those could be in conflict.

I didn't read all the PDFs at the end yet. I did find what you (Rapt Reader) quoted from the stress management PDF interesting. "Objective analysis" was one of my highly ranked values, and that probably makes me a fixer too: oh there's a problem? yeah I can figure out the solution. I realize now that this is one thing my therapist had mentioned to me in a roundabout way.