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Children, Parents, or Relatives with BPD => Son, Daughter or Son/Daughter In-law with BPD => Topic started by: tightropewalker on November 05, 2013, 03:34:13 PM



Title: Is this normal
Post by: tightropewalker on November 05, 2013, 03:34:13 PM
Basically my DD was diagnosed with BPD around a month ago by her counsellor at the same, the diagnosis was welcome after going to hell and back with her several times, at least now we could know the reason for her behaviour, shortly after diagnosis she was discharged from the young peoples mental health team as she had turned 19, we were advised to see her GP who could refer to adult mental health.  This we did yesterday only for him to tell us to come back in 6 weeks and in the In between time my DD was to try harder to structure her days and not to let the BPD define who she is. I feel almost back to square one and so frustrated,

My DD leaves all the talking to me as she finds it hard to speak up and I fear this makes me look like a pushy mum who's over reacting.


Title: Re: Is this normal
Post by: crazedncrazymom on November 06, 2013, 07:00:17 AM
 *welcome*  I know it is a relief being able to label what dd is going through so you can make an action plan.  I remember before dd16 was diagnosed we were just out at sea in the middle of a storm with no land in sight.  Things get really tough still but at least we are better equipped to deal with everything. 

Such bad timing to have to find a new dr that your dd can trust and build a connection.  You could be a little more proactive.  Do a search for DBT in your area and go from there.  It takes a lot of effort to find a therapist/pdoc who understands BPD.  This isn't your everyday illness and most don't understand that.

It sounds like you have a good connection with your dd.  Is that right?  If so, you can be as much help as a therapist.  A great starting place would be to check out the tools and lessons on the right hand side of the board. 

Again, welcome!  I hope you find the support and answers you need here with us.

-crazed


Title: Re: Is this normal
Post by: crumblingdad on November 06, 2013, 10:13:07 AM
So frustrating to have to change treatment providers like that.  Even more frustrating to hear something like "you have to structure your days better and don't let BPD define you" as a treatment plan to fill a 6 week.


I think it's great that your dd is open to therapy and has a close enough connection with you to let you do the talking during this time where I would think she may feel she's out on an island waiting for some help.  I wouldn't let that make you feel pushy as whatever mode of communication is necessary is better then none until you find a competent provider.  I also wouldn't hesitate to ask for additional referrals and see if someone will see her sooner that has some experience and understanding in treating BPD.



Title: Re: Is this normal
Post by: BioAdoptMom3 on November 06, 2013, 09:28:44 PM
I agree on searching for a therapist who is experienced in DBT!  I actually did that search myself last night for our DD who already has her own therapist.  Though they have connected and she likes her, I have heard that DBT is the most effective treatment out there right now.  Just do a Google looking for therapists in your area who practice that form of therapy!  My heart goes out to you on her being told to just structure her days better, etc.  Most people, even doctors, do not fully understand BPD!