BPDFamily.com

For many of us, the holidays are stressful. There's the shopping, the crowds, the hustle, and not to mention our relatives with BPD.    What's often depicted in movies and on TV as "the most wonderful time of the year," for some can be overwhelming and lonely. Some of us are facing some challenging family events.

This is the time of the year when I need to take extra care of myself. The ordinary things (laundry, dinner and work) need to get done, but on top of that I have to make time to make sure that the tree is decorated, DS has presents to unwrap, and cookies are baked (and let's face it... .consumed as well  )

I thought it would be helpful for us all to share some stress-relieving strategies. What's helped me:

• when I know I'm going to an event where I know I'll be stressed, I plan something fun afterward



• yoga or a walk outside



• playing with my dog and/or son



• watching a cheesy or funny movie

What works for you?   

Ho Ho Ho!      I used to really feel stressed during the holidays, but with lots of therapy and a loving husband/ in-laws, holidays have become fun again.  To reduce stress I:

- Keep gift-buying to a minimum and let people know in advance so that I don't feel overwhelmed with finding everyone "that perfect gift" since Husband and I both have large families

- Get shopping done early so that I don't have to brave the malls

- Go to parties, but not ALL the parties, so that I have time to kick back

- This year I am trying to minimize contact with BPDMom so that I can enjoy at least some of the day.  We will see how it goes!

This may sound silly, but I'll lock myself in my sewing room, turn on some music and sing songs as loudly as I can for a while.  And if my kids are around at the time, there's the added benefit of them laughing at me.   :)

It's the little things that help! I love baking so I'm always in the kitchen. So far I've made 30 reindeer cookies and lots of Christmas cup cakes.

Love what was said about shopping early. I got all of mine end of November and they all got wrapped last week. Goodbye shopping stress!  |iiii

I'm also not spending Christmas with my dBPDsis as she will be with my Dad 7 hours away. No worrying about her drinking and making a scene! Although she is generally good at Christmas, she'd always wake me up at 6am for presents and have to go back to bed at midday as she was so irritable and overtired. I feel like I'm looking after a toddler with her sometimes haha.

I'm looking forward to waking up with my boyfriend for the first time this year. Yep, it's definitely the small things you look forward to!

Merry Christmas everyone   

Great ideas! Jodi_WG, that doesn't sound silly at all to me. I might just do that as I'm wrapping presents. :) CinnamonRadio, I love the idea of making time for yourself. We get so wrapped up (no pun intended) in parties, shopping, etc, and sometimes we forget that it's ok to chill out! Blondy90, baking can be so therapeutic--and I bet those cookies and cupcakes are incredible.   

I used to love the holidays before I met my uBPDmil. Even though hubby and I are no contact with her we still haven't recovered due to past extreme conflict surrounding Christmas.

To cope I am trying the following this year:

- finished Christmas shopping early to prevent stress

- decided to not host any functions for this year

- opted to not decorate as we aren't hosting and don't yet have kids

- turned down non family Christmas functions to allow more down time

I kind of feel like scrooge as we aren't really Christmas-y this year but I feel like I needed to reclaim the holiday after being pushed around on expectations for so long. New Year, new rules, my rules. Gaining power back over my life is very rewarding but I still fear future Christmases with her.