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She informed me she is moving from uk to New Zealand during this coming year.

I feel like ive been kicked in the guts.

Its like ive lost her all over again

All those secret hidden dreams of a recycle, of it all working out, true love winning the day.

All over now.

Its closure

All the dreams are dead. She might as well be on mars.

Yeah, its closure.

I am really sorry that you had to find that out. My NC is fast approaching 6 months and the lack of any acknowledgement from her has forced me to start accepting that she is/most likely gone forever too.

Thanks ironmanfalls.

Its just sad. If your like me you keep this little hope they would come back.

Also, im happy for her. If its real then shes doing something amazing with her life but coz of NC I cant congratulate her.

But, end of the day she cheated all over me with this guy.

Strange set of emotions today. Need clarity.

Hope all is ok with you ironman.

Believe it when she's gone. Bpds say a lot of things.

And if she goes? Best possible outcome for you, in the long run, even if it doesn't feel that way now.

Jbt857,

Yeah, its a major possibility that it wont happen. All the promises and dreams we made to each other never materialised. None of our goals actually came to fruition.

I also think im envious of her, my life is really broken and crappy at the moment and hers is amazing! So she says! Lol.

I really need to change my mob number abd enforce nc. Shes doing my head in with her little texts. They are all loaded with malicious intent.

Can you not block her number rather than having to change yours?

But yes, I advocate NC - it certainly helps.

And while she says her life is amazing... . The wheels will come off soon enough. You'll see. And, in the meantime, if you can do some work on you, by the time they do, you won't even care. It's taken me almost a year, but I'm finally starting to feel relieved that my ex is someone else's problem now, and am starting to look forward to the prospect of dating and meeting someone new in the future. Give it time.

 

I cant block her on my phone.

Yeah, her BPD will kick in at some point.

Im 3 months out and ive tried dating but its way to soon for me.

Thats how I know for sure she has issues coz she is all settled and cozy and im still picking up the pieces. Its not normal.

Im excited that this will be a great year for me, im sure of it.

Just need to stay nc and stay focused.

Sounds like a great plan, Naddred.     We are all cheering for you.

Here is something I've been telling myself, hope it helps you too:

Whichever way their lives go from here, it didn't work with us.

Whichever way our lives go from here, it didn't work with them.

Hello again Naddred-

I purposely avoid anything to do with my ex husband w/ BPD. I refuse to do any type of digging, or ask anyone any questions about him. The one time I did, I re broke my own heart. He didn't do it to me that time... I did it to myself.

The less you know Naddred, the better off you will be. I really wish you could change your number or block her. I don't like the thought of her being able to contact you whenever the whim strikes her.

oh and by the way... her pretense of being happy in her new relationship, is exactly that. She is not, and will never be happy, that is the nature of the disorder. You know this deep down.

L