BPDFamily.com

Sometimes I alternate between being sick of my ex DiL and her antics and at other times almost amusement that she thinks I am taken in by her manipulative behaviour. A few Weeks ago she just wished me dead and wouldn't talk or acknowledge me for over a year but since Christmas day when she sent texts  about our son not answering his phone and how terrible he is. We replied that there are 2 other phones she could call, more texts after this about how terrible our son is and then surprise when she didn't get the answer she wanted she sent me a text (the 1st contact in over a year) to complain to me! I did reply giving advice but creating boundaries. But I did find this amusing that when no one else would give her the answers she wants she has resorted to contacting the person she had painted the blackest! Do other people do this ie go through the hurt stage, angry stage then just come to terms with it or is it one of my coping mechanisms I learned as an oncology nurse (most of us had a fairly black sense of humour which was needed for survival), or do these stages come and go through time?

Have just found out why we are her friends again... . my son is dropping and picking up their daughter at a distance i.e. from 50ft. away. This is obviously disconcerting her somewhat as she cannot rage face to face. The gamut of emotions I feel within one day are amazing fed up, worried, anxious, amusement, sad does this happen to others?

It's very normal to go through a wide range of emotions in a short period of time. It sounds like you're going through the grieving process, which is also very common with people who have relatives with BPD. We often grieve for the relationships we wish we had, or thought we had.

Have you been feeling stronger emotions since Christmas Day? What will you do if your exDIL continues to send you texts?