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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Conflicted About Continuing, Divorcing/Custody, Co-parenting => Topic started by: Mutt on January 07, 2014, 12:29:04 PM



Title: Got 50/50 (interim)
Post by: Mutt on January 07, 2014, 12:29:04 PM
So after a few months of adjourning because I was waiting on Legal Aid (Canada) to appoint a lawyer, the ex finally budged or caved in yesterday. I'm not sure which. I reached out to her on the New Year to talk about the divorce that she had initiated/wanted. It had been almost a year since I had mentioned anything about the divorce because it was a subject that she avoided and called it harassment on my part if I brought it up. I figured a lot of time has passed, she may be anxious to marry the replacement and may concede and she had agreed to do 50/50.

She had agreed to 50/50 custody but interim to see how the kids adjust. It's funny that the replacement didn't have to have an interim order when he moved in with them 3 weeks after we separated to see how they adjusted.

My L said take this but be consistent with the kids and if their grades in school go up etc... . she won't be able to dispute it in May when the interim order gets reviewed again.

The STBX has them one week and I get them the next week etc... . I'm over the moon that after I year I finally got what I wanted for the kids, but at the same time, I'm gobsmacked that she went ahead and did it after a year of not wanting to do a separation agreement, mediation and not allowing me to have the kids more than 2 weekends a month.


Title: Re: Got 50/50 (interim)
Post by: Nope on January 07, 2014, 12:56:34 PM
I'm assuming the agreement is in writing and signed and the court was somehow involved? If so, she may just not understand that she can't revoke that the first time she gets angry. Either that or maybe she is trying to look good in front of the replacement?

Either way, congratulations on getting what you wanted! You are starting from a good place.


Title: Re: Got 50/50 (interim)
Post by: Mutt on January 07, 2014, 01:07:11 PM
I'm assuming the agreement is in writing and signed and the court was somehow involved? If so, she may just not understand that she can't revoke that the first time she gets angry. Either that or maybe she is trying to look good in front of the replacement?

Either way, congratulations on getting what you wanted! You are starting from a good place.

Thanks Nope!

I have absolutely no idea why she did a 180. I do understand that it was not for the kids or for myself.

It was in done in front of a judge in family court yesterday, yes.