BPDFamily.com

So a few weeks ago I had to take my wedding rings off because with the temperature fluctuations and a medical condition flaring my fingers were swelling and my rings were way too tight on my finger. Didn't think about it again. I have been busy with work life my car issue and being sick. They are sitting on my desk.

Noticed today H isn't wearing his ring so I ask him if he lost it again. That is sarcastic because when he has gotten mad in the past he "loses" his ring-I think he throws them out the car window. Anyway I get "you took yours off so I took mine off too. Now you can see how it feels. You deserve to be punished for hurting my feelings." I laughed really really loud. This tit for tat stuff is so ridiculous and I am over being punished. He so belongs on a playground somewhere with his ridiculousness.

I am *this* close to this being it. I will not go through the wringer with him again because he is not worth it. I had a taste of normalcy the other night and know what I am missing out on. Playing playground monitor to a grown man isn't on my list of fun things to do.

I will hear back on Monday about a long term contract. My medical class doesn't start for another month but I think I am going to take a bartending class so I can get a nights/weekend job. Friend is doing it and making great $$ for two days a week. As long as I can get the financial part covered I am done with this.

Please keep your fingers crossed for me that all the stars align and I can get my ducks in a row. I cannot stand looking at him and he is here until Monday night. Of course when I said "when you take your ring off in spite like that the only thing I can assume is you are done too and will be leaving." Of course that wasn't his plan. I get the feeling he is planning on making this a miserable weekend. I have had to work all day but he is sitting there stating at me with that stupid smirk on his face like he got one over on me or something so may be a long night. Little does he know he may have just played his last "game." I hate him.

Do you feel hate or do you feel enlightenment?

A true feeling of finality often comes with a euphoric feel of freedom.