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Children, Parents, or Relatives with BPD => Son, Daughter or Son/Daughter In-law with BPD => Topic started by: thelady_v2010 on February 14, 2014, 06:41:51 PM



Title: InPatient
Post by: thelady_v2010 on February 14, 2014, 06:41:51 PM
My son has agreed to go to inpatient treatment, now comes the hard part of finding one. Are there resources or lists here? Can anyone point me to a starting place? We have really good insurance, so money should not be an issue.


Title: Re: InPatient
Post by: Rapt Reader on February 14, 2014, 11:11:22 PM
Hi, thelady_v2010 &  *welcome*

That's GREAT that your son is willing to go to an Inpatient Treatment program! It is the first step to recovery, and can really make things better. Have you checked out Lesson 5 (https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?topic=114267.msg1125531#msg1125531) of THE LESSONS (see the links to the right-hand side of this page)? You will find lots of very helpful information at that link, and at all the links to the right of this page.

My own son was diagnosed with BPD at an intensive Inpatient Dual Diagnosis Program (it lasted 21 days), and the treatment at that Center started a recovery that has helped him immensely (his story is at the blue link in my signature a the bottom of this post). I'm very happy for you that your son is willing to get the help he needs... . He really can get to a better place if he realizes he needs help and then accepts it. How old is he? Does he live at home with you? Please tell us more of your story and ask whatever questions you have, and especially after reading the information at that link... .


Title: Re: InPatient
Post by: thelady_v2010 on February 15, 2014, 09:33:23 AM
He is 20 and is currently in jail. He has not lived with me full time since he was 18. He lived in his car for 7 months, then with me for a couple months, then I paid for an apartment and all his bills for a year because it was too stressful for him to live with me. He can come home when he gets out of jail, but he has to get treatment. He was supposed to get out in 5 weeks, but he got kicked out of the reentry program and in jail, which was a  violation of his probation (I don't get that, but that is what he was told). The judge is now deciding if he gets 5 more months. For using a credit card a friend told him belonged to his mom and charging 69.09 to it, he may spend 11 months in jail, it was his 1st offense. So, I am pretty bitter because I think we got really bad legal advice. He doesn't need to be in jail. His PO came to visit him yesterday and told him if the judge doesn't give him more time then she is going to be extra hard on him when he gets out. Because that is what he needs. He is not violent at all, he just can't fit in with society, can't get along with people, can't keep a job because people don't like him. So this probation is going to be a revolving door to jail I am afraid.


Title: Re: InPatient
Post by: Rapt Reader on February 15, 2014, 09:54:14 AM
I'm sorry to hear about that, thelady_v2010... . It does sound like your son needs the help that an Inpatient Program can provide. Has he ever been formally diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder? Has he ever gotten treatment for it? Will the Court System have any say in where he would be admitted if they let him out and he goes to an Inpatient Program? Maybe you can talk to them, or your County/City/Local Mental Health Services, for some sort of guidance as to where would be best for his needs.

My son was not only diagnosed (eventually) with BPD, but had a heroin addiction and suicidal ideations, which is why he ended up in the Dual Diagnosis Program that really saved his life and turned him into a very different person. If your son has multiple diagnoses and problems, besides some sort of mental health issue, then you might want to look into a Dual Diagnosis Program for him.

At 20, he is young enough to really get turned around if he can get the mental health treatment(s) he needs. There are several parents on this Board who have had their child (even an adult child; my own son is 36) admitted to some sort of Inpatient Program, and they can help answer your questions and also give you guidance. Hang in there, thelady... . we've all experienced traumas with our BPD children, and there really can be light at the end of the tunnel