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Title: 5 Days of NC (and I feel pretty amazing) Post by: JohnThorn on April 20, 2014, 02:10:11 PM about 2 weeks ago my uBPD ex and I made an abrupt and seemingly official end. About 5 days ago I reached out to her in a fit of devastation and desperation. She ignored my messages.
After this, I felt it was really over. And I gotta tell you guys, I don't know why, but I am able to think of her, our relationship and all that unfolded without feeling the pain I used to. I have been feeling wonderful! I started hitting the gym again. I started waking up without feeling a cloud of doom all over. I feel like I'm going back to being a full person. I haven't felt compelled to look at her facebook or find pictures of her. I don't know why this is. All I can say is in reading many of your experiences and seeing how they mirrored my own with her, I was able to feel like my ex is not good for anyone, not just me. She is a disaster. YOUR EX is a disaster. No matter how much pain they caused you (and continue you to cause you)... . You are lucky. You are lucky to be alive (because there were many times I questioned my desire to live while I was with her... . I'm sure some of you did too)... . You are also lucky to be away from her/him... . they are so messed up and only hurt us, like a drug. I am so glad I found this place early on. It has helped put me in the right direction. I feel genuinely happy that she and I are over and I never thought I would feel that way as soon as I have felt it. Title: Re: 5 Days of NC (and I feel pretty amazing) Post by: Mutt on April 20, 2014, 02:16:38 PM The FOG is starting to lift. Releasing endorphins is good. Don't be discouraged if you start to feel a little bad again in a few days. Stick with it, you'll continue to see the benefits.
Title: Re: 5 Days of NC (and I feel pretty amazing) Post by: falconfree28 on April 20, 2014, 02:20:36 PM Great to hear your story.
I've been 7 weeks NC, and I'm working through the guilt I was made to suffer through, each day does get a lot better, you'll be amazed how much the little things matter. I completely forgot to delete all e-mails, I did a search, didn't even bother reading them and every little things I delete of her in my life makes me feel "that little bit" better. Your post inspired me as I was having a down day, but it's made me smile, I look forward to reading your posts as that FOG goes away. Title: Re: 5 Days of NC (and I feel pretty amazing) Post by: Pecator on April 20, 2014, 02:43:39 PM Wow,
I am a religious kind of guy. Sitting more alone than I have ever felt in my life. First time I missed an Easter Sunday morning service in decades. (I was up all night after I allowed my ex to break N/C). Came to a local pub just to get out of the isolation. Pulled up these pages and found the most authentic stories of resurrection I have ever read. I am very inspired to bring that to my life. To do it now! John, Falcon, I will catch up. Bless you both for sharing your successes here. I know it won't be an easy path, but I will follow! |