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Title: Are borderlines often stalkers? Post by: TitaniumPhoebe on May 04, 2014, 07:09:18 PM I just was watching a TV show about stalking and was thinking wow, this person seems like they have BPD, and sure enough, the psychologist on the show said they did right after I thought it. So it got me wondering if that's common. One of the significant traits of the disorder is a fear of abandonment, so it makes sense that after they have perceived they were abandoned they might not want to let go. I've felt a little cyber stalked by a guy I was seeing who has borderline traits and am not sure he even understands I don't want to be involved with him anymore. And I heard he sort of stalked his ex he was with before by happening to be at a lot of places where she was "coincidentally."
Title: Re: Are borderlines often stalkers? Post by: MidKnightsun on May 07, 2014, 11:05:43 AM My exBPD was a cyber stalker. A real snoop. I had to unfriend him on Facebook because he would interrogate me about the men "Friends" and would search them on the internet. The worst was when he got the name of the last guy I dated out of me and called him to get a reference, asked the guy why we broke up. It was so embarrassing. It made the guy think I was still talking about him, which I wasn't. That whole incident should have been a red flag that the BPD guy was weird.
Title: Re: Are borderlines often stalkers? Post by: MrFox on May 07, 2014, 02:47:25 PM From what I have seen and experienced, it's pretty common for pwBPD to engage in stalking behaviors. My exBPDgf engaged in this behavior during our relationship. She constantly monitored my online presence. She also befriended people from my past that I no longer had much contact with to find out information. She could have just asked. After our break-up I was often told by people we mutually know that she was constantly asking about me and what I was up to. Whether or not she continues her cyber stalking, I have no clue. My own BPDmother still cyber stalks people she hasn't contact with in years or decades.
I think it is a combination of need for control and an inability to truly detach from another person. Title: Re: Are borderlines often stalkers? Post by: Promises on May 07, 2014, 09:58:16 PM Mine sure is. Cyber and real life. Have a temporary protection order now and next week I should be granted a 5 year protection order. He is obsessive, delusional, has to have control and scary as hell. Hope he forgets about me by 5 years from now but I honestly think he'll be back. He could be married and I could still see it happening.
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