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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Conflicted About Continuing, Divorcing/Custody, Co-parenting => Topic started by: cobaltblue on May 24, 2014, 11:10:47 PM



Title: Journaling and sanity
Post by: cobaltblue on May 24, 2014, 11:10:47 PM
Have been advised by attorney to journal my interaction with the kids pending a custody evaluation and custody fight. Proposed joint custody and UBPDw rejected it and seeking sole custody.

I need advice from those who have presented journals in such hearings because I have no idea how detailed I'm supposed to document. In absence of parameters, I think I'm going to go nuts if I have to write down every action through the litigation date and beyond. It's no way to live.

Are there any examples of journaling that were viewed favorably that you can direct me to?

I asked the attorney for parameters and whether it was supposed to be five bullets per day or five pages of text and she answered simply "The more the better" which doesn't help me at all. I don't want the time and anxiety of writing 5-10 pages a day if 5-10 bullet items will suffice.

Thanks in advance.


Title: Re: Journaling and sanity
Post by: whirlpoollife on May 25, 2014, 08:55:47 AM
Break it down into an outline instead of an essay.

What you do as a parent to your kids:

Doctor / dental appts , who pays for it

Do you take the kids to school, wait at bus stop with them

Are they showered and well dressed

Did they have breakfast

Did they have a lunch or lunch money

Do you help them with homework

Do you make sure they have dinner

Who makes them practice music lessons

Who schedules after school activities , who takes them. Do you go to their sports

Note special things you do with kids, read to them, bicycling, go for walks, play computer games /card games with them, go carting, zoos, cook etc.

We're you involved with the school this past year, volunteering

Are you involved religiously with kids

Who buys their clothes


Are you consistent with what you do for kids or only when you feel like it

My x2bh did not do any of the above which saved me from custody going to 50/50... . but he got more time than he should have because he played the ":)isneyland dad" in the couple months prior to the hearing , took kids out on excursions for the day, pretended to be involved, and used PA.

So this will take time but hopefully it.