BPDFamily.com

I just read the thread about their aura.

Before I get to the topic of my thread/question I will real quick say something about it. The first photo she sent me of herself, I had seen her before and that might be the reason it struck me back then too, was a selfie she took on the way to work.

She looked different. And more importantly there was something in her eyes. Couldn't put my finger on it, but it was deep, mysterious and dark. I immediately felt something like "you should leave that alone"  but at the same time that was the moment when sympathy turned into being sacked towards her. I could  almost physically feel it.

If I look at photos I took of her and she sent me... . She often looks different. Has nothing to do with styling, hair etc. It's like it's a different human being. A different person.

Maybe this is what has been caught on film, her different emotional States, "personalities" (I am a well aware she hasn't multiple personalities.) it's something subtle but yet striking. Difficult to explain.

My sister noticed it too. But most of my friends didn't.

Weird. Maybe some people have the ability to see such things. Others don't.

Unrelated, but I don't want want to start an extra thread.

She often said: "Why are you looking at me?"

When I looked over to her while we ie watched TV.

It felt like it was threatening to her. I never understood that. To this day, and I understand a lot.

The wife of my brother said my ex had evil eyes. The brother of my best friend is manic depressive and once they came to visit and my ex cooked... . The brother of my friend was eating very hesitant, and later told his brother: "she has evil eyes, i think she tried to poison us with the food."... . Of course she didn't try to poison them, but i think sometimes people can sense a vibe they get from other people. Sometimes you should pay attention to it... . I didn't.

Yes I totally relate. My exBPD had weird eyes. Sometimes face to face he looked different. Once during a meltdown I could barely recognise him. One of my friends commented on his photos " there's something about the eyes" and I saw it but ignored it.

My ex h had bipolar and he always looked different. Haunted.

Yes I got this alot, a lot of grumpy photos were taken. She would pose happily with ':)uck Face', huge fake smiles, over made up. But when I tried to take natural, casual shots (with makeup) she would walk away.

Her selfies were like Picassos, face all twisted contortions.

I managed in 4 years to get a relaxed face 2 times, she looked at them puzzled.

Our dog used to look into the mirror and she would say as if the dog... .

"Who am I"

The clues are all around.

Might have drowned in my initial post. But I read often references to the

"Why are you looking at me (like that)" in situations it was totally normal.

"Why are you looking at me like that right now?" (Just looking over while watching TV.

"Because I love you :)"

The reaction to that always was as if she felt threatened or I was creepy or... . I actually don't even know.

I noticed this about my BPD ex too and so did my friend.

I wouldn’t say mine had "evil" eyes but she definitely give'd off an unbalanced look through the eyes which is very visible on a lot of photos.

My friends comments was when I showed him was "There's a lot of problems hidden behind those eyes"

By the sounds of it there's quite a link here, I guess the eyes can be a little clue into somethings not quite right. I did initially think this early on but as all of us chose to ignore that possible red flag. 

I have to say its something I now pay attention too!

Paulo Coelho wrote a story about somethink like (don't remember the details)... . A person wants to do business with someone from another country. They never came to an agreement, until he decided to go and meet the other person. When they finally met they could see in each others eyes their intentions... . And the deal that never worked out via emails, took place.

He says there is nothing like looking into another persons eyes, because the eyes can't hide your true self.

I guess i too should pay more attention to this.

Normally, I really don't buy into all of the "mystery" that often seems to be ascribed to people with BPD, but when my ex became angry her eyes would scare the living daylights out of me. It is very hard to explain, but it was as if her eyes almost turned black and there was such anger and viciousness in her gaze that my heart literally raced the first time I saw it. I have never seen anything like it in any other people.

As far as what my friends said... . well, I probably should have listened to the one who said, "She looks at you as a predator looks at prey."  

wow, just wow!

You completely just put into words what I'd noticed. Photos seem to capture something that hits our subconscious. You look at different pictures and they really do seem to be different people. I actually saw a new picture on her facebook after she'd discarded me, and it took me aback... it wasn't 'my pwBPD' anymore. I put it down to a new hairstyle, but I looked at her and she didn't look like her. I can't explain it, but it just didn't feel like her. It helped, I just grieved for someone I see as dead now. Add to that completely new hairstyles, different make up style.

Its funny that the last place where she still seems like 'my pwBPD' is on one website, its the one website where neither of us can block one another. and her photo on there is an 'angry face' obviously targeted at me. But... its evil angry, and whats more crazy is that she would photograph herself with a demoniacally angry face. Mainly cos I deleted some stuff off there.

It is the eyes. I seriously consider that maybe... just maybe BPDs are possessed. weird stuff would happen in her house... who knows? Also, we did a lot of skyping, mainly cos she would always put off hanging out with me, I think in case her other guys saw us (where we live is a pretty small area, one town centre where we would have gone) on skype she looked completely different to in person, it was striking, and often she would literally look at me, with this empty stare, cock her head to the left, and do a little smile. Honestly looking back it scares me. What also scares me is how she looks so different in such a short time. Physically and 'psychically'.

I just know, that for such a beautiful, sweet, adorable girl, theres some serious evil there!

OP, this is an excellent post, I never would have thought to post it, but nail, head, right on it.