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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Conflicted About Continuing, Divorcing/Custody, Co-parenting => Topic started by: Ihope2 on June 09, 2014, 02:30:56 AM



Title: Got a Divorce Trial Date in Court
Post by: Ihope2 on June 09, 2014, 02:30:56 AM
My Divorce Trial Date is in two weeks' time.  I feel mostly relief, that the marital ties can be severed as soon as possible.  And I feel sad, that the "dream" ended in such a nightmare.

I consider myself fortunate, to be able to come out of it quickly.

Met him at the end of March 2013, married at the end of April 2013.  Realised in around Sept/Oct 2013 that he probably has BPD. Realised at the end of March 2014 that I can't do this marriage/relationship any more, it was draining the life out of me.

He moved out on 31st March 2014.  He signed a settlement agreement on 01st April and left the city where I live for an unknown destination.

The divorce trial will happen in two weeks, and by the 20th June 2014, it will all be over and done with. 


Since he moved out, he has tried to kill himself, tried to blame me, tried to contact me and pressurise me about money.  I have been in therapy since the begining of the year, working through my life and my issues and this most toxic of relationships I have ever been in. 

I am putting this behind me, making the most incredible of learnings and self-awakenings, I thank him for coming into my life as a "teacher" and I wish blessings upon him as he moves on with his life, or decides to end his life once and for all.  I have let go of most of it and am continuing to let go.


Title: Re: Got a Divorce Trial Date in Court
Post by: Cimbaruns on June 09, 2014, 05:38:19 AM
Ihope2

It is very sad ... . the ending of a dream we once held... .

Happy for you that you are taking the steps that you need to move on... .

Sending you much strength and wishing you peace ... .

We are always here for support

Cimbaruns


Title: Re: Got a Divorce Trial Date in Court
Post by: ForeverDad on June 09, 2014, 06:34:09 AM
It is so sad to have to pay such a high price to discover you can't fix others, while you can support them if recovering, you can only fix yourself.  Setting boundaries for yourself, not to be abused or emotionally trampled is very necessary.  Your life is yours to own, his is his to own.

He may very well pop in just before the trial so be prepared emotionally and legally in case he does and also in case he doesn't.


Title: Re: Got a Divorce Trial Date in Court
Post by: Ihope2 on June 09, 2014, 08:55:03 AM
Thank you, I am so very thankful for bpdfamily.com and everyone here.  It would have been a very lonely and confusing journey on my own.

I would have questioned my reality far more, had it not been for the insights and experiences and advice of the people here... .