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Title: I need help and advice Post by: JohnThorn on June 12, 2014, 07:41:44 AM Hi guys,
It is her birthday today. I woke up contemplating messaging her a happy birthday. I then suddenly noticed on my viber app that she called me last night while I was sleeping. I went to return her call but it said she deleted her viber app. Her last contact with me was about a month ago telling me I was awful and that To stop trying to ruin her life. No idea what she was talking about. Then on memorial day I started receiving notifications from the holiday inn that she booked a stay there. I got these notifications because we put my email on her holiday inn account when we were together. I forwarded her my emails from holiday inn asking her to remove me. In response, her ex boyfriend contacted me on Facebook telling me to leave her alone. I presumed they were together now. Then this phone call... . what should I make of this? Title: Re: I need help and advice Post by: Trent on June 12, 2014, 08:20:36 AM I woke up contemplating messaging her a happy birthday. ... . I went to return her call Why are you considering and/or trying to contact her? Then this phone call... . what should I make of this? She's probably just going through her normal BPD push-pull stuff. Title: Re: I need help and advice Post by: BorisAcusio on June 12, 2014, 08:31:38 AM Nothing good will come out from contacting her on special occasions, in fact, on any occasion in the future. Been there, done that. The mind needs space away from the craziness to heal and detach.
Title: Re: I need help and advice Post by: BacknthSaddle on June 12, 2014, 08:53:46 AM What Boris said is exactly right. You'll feel some pain today if you don't contact her and you'll feel pain if you do. If she doesn't call again it will be upsetting and if she does it will be upsetting. Just allow yourself to feel the pain and the upset. It's only one day. But you have many days ahead, and the best ticket to enjoying them is to avoid contact with this person.
Title: Re: I need help and advice Post by: LettingGo14 on June 12, 2014, 08:58:49 AM Then this phone call... . what should I make of this? JT -- given the Facebook exchange with her ex-boyfriend, it's good for you to take a step back to re-frame, reconsider, and perhaps hold off any contact. Too often, we feel like we are at the mercy of our exes --- wondering if they are wondering, secretly hoping they are thinking of us, and reading into actions. We need to reclaim ourselves. I would never tell you what course you should take -- but I think it's worth you deciding what takes best care of you in the long run. |