BPDFamily.com

I signed up for a fall course offered here in my city.  It will meet for 10 Saturdays for 2 hrs each.  I put it on my google calendar.  And guess who blew up?

"I can't handle the children by myself!"

"All they do is teach you how to commit people and set up financial trusts to keep the money for the children."

"If you do this I will relapse and have to go back into the hospital again... . then who would care for the kids when I am hospitalized?"

"You obviously think I'm not getting any better."

She went so far as to print the web pages from the NAMI site to show me her proof.

Etc. Etc. Etc.

I haven't even posted about her insistence she will relapse when I go OOT on a well-in-advanced-plan to pick up my oldest S10 for Parent's weekend at Summer Camp... . leaving her "alone to deal with the other kids."  "What happens if I wind up in the hospital ?" "Who will take care of the kids?  Childrens/Family services will come and take the kids away." 

Did I mention she has cut off her last relative who lives here in town ... effectively leaving us with "no help."

I calmly repeated to her:  I will ask the babysitters we are using to see who can work.  If you get hospitalized, I will drive the three hours back from Camp and take all the kids with me for the rest of the weekend, despite the oldest's need to be away from them (which I actually think is a reaction to my spouse's disordered chaos).

Maybe medications #37, which had been working "well" for the last month" will suddenly stop working that weekend as well.

Things that make you say Hmmmm.

Thoughts?

Thought #1: You are doing something independent to take care of yourself. She is having an extinction burst / blowing a gasket.

Here is your chance to teach her how blowing a gasket as an attempt to controls you works. Do you want to teach her that you will cave in response?

Thought #2: I've got a good friend who has wonderful things to say about NAMI. No personal experience though.

Thanks, GK.

I have every intention of going to the NAMI conference.  I agree that this is in direct response to my thoughts of independence.

I think next time she will take a cab to the Hospital:  her most recent ambulance transport bill is over two grand. 

Coincidentally tomorrow we have a "family session" with her T at her IOP program.  I have two agenda items to discuss:

Why should I not attend the conference that is being held on the very grounds of her IOP facility she attends?

Is her behavior/reaction considered progress?

Hmmmm... .

Time to think, ponder, let it incubate.  What to do?