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Title: Thank Goodness for Validation and Keeping Mouth Closed Post by: wilsonian on July 03, 2014, 09:46:13 AM Ok... .went home last night and soon as I hit the door she started with the stresses of the day and previous days... weeks etc... so I started validation soon as I hit the door ... That and keeping my mouth closed and ears wide open... .plus watching each word I spoke not to cause a trigger... Had a wonderful evening I threw in a over amount of sympathy and I believe she wore her self out so bad with all the anger and negative thoughts and words she fell asleep in my arms last night... It was so nice to have a NORMAL night with my wife... Cudos to this site allowing me to vent... feedback from all and the lessons to learn from over and over again... maybe one day I will get it right lol
Title: Re: Thank Goodness for Validation and Keeping Mouth Closed Post by: maxsterling on July 03, 2014, 10:55:37 AM Hey, congrats!
that's a big step. Yes, the validation and listening does help. Just be careful, if this goes on night after night and you feel like you need to constantly be validating and soothing her moods, it will wear you out, you will lose sight of who you are and what you want, and then your wife may react negatively to your detached behavior. |