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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship => Topic started by: Overbeck on July 20, 2014, 09:09:02 AM



Title: She knows I know
Post by: Overbeck on July 20, 2014, 09:09:02 AM
On June 18th, every suspicion I had about my Borderline alcoholic ex was confirmed when I saw her in a car with another man. This man was someone I suspected that she had been with. More information that I obtained after suggests she had been with him during our last days... .and possibly into last year when we were somewhat happy.

Our NC usually lasts between 2 to 4 weeks. Today is 32 days. That is not uncommon. But here is the thing that is on my mind.

Now that she knows I know, I am wondering if maybe, possibly I am the fortunate one who finally has her out of my life. Is her shame of knowing that I know she is a lying whore going to keep her away? She used say that to me: "You just think I am a lying whore!" Well, every doubt I had was SPOT ON!

My closest friends and my doctor do not believe she is done with me. I do not believe it. But the curiosity gets to me.

Her lies and malicious conduct towards me have done much damage. I will NEVER contact her again. I will never forgive her. The thought of her makes me physically ill. She is dirt to me.

IGNORE! IGNORE! IGNORE!

But the question must be asked:

Now that I know she is a lying whore, can she finally do one thing I have asked her to do and just go away?


Title: Re: She knows I know
Post by: Aussie JJ on July 20, 2014, 10:15:33 AM
Dude, anger will keep her in your head for bloody ever. 

Should make you happy that she has someone else.  If you have no kids they wont be exposed to the dynamic.  Not your concern, your lucky!


Title: Re: She knows I know
Post by: Overbeck on July 20, 2014, 10:40:12 AM
Dude, anger will keep her in your head for bloody ever. 

Should make you happy that she has someone else.  If you have no kids they wont be exposed to the dynamic.  Not your concern, your lucky!

I am lucky. But she's not done with me yet. And until we get the last altercation done with, I'll be waiting.

Mine is a small town.


Title: Re: She knows I know
Post by: PhoenixFromTheFlames on July 20, 2014, 11:25:15 AM
Hey Chief - I'm sorry you have to go through this ... .when you get the confirmation it's very hard but its freeing in some ways, isn't it?  She will contact you in due time ... .when she needs something (as you already know).  I would urge you to consider what you will do when she does contact you ... .having a plan is important.  Aussie provides good advice ... .process the anger so she can't occupy your head.  The best thing for us is to move on in our lives without them and find our strength, peace & happiness within us.

Good luck, Chief!

-Phoenix