Title: Bpd friends? Post by: qwaszx on July 24, 2014, 07:03:54 PM Hey, so I had met one pwBPD about 4 years ago... who is now out of my life... .but I've met another girl who has seems far to much like she has BPD for my liking, but I don't want to write her off either or live worried about everyone I met being a BPD... she is also a client where I work, so there is no cutting ties... .
I've hung out with her About 5 times now, and know all about her sex life, bf problems, she's a striper, no boundary's, and is really unfiltered, talks about having men lined up for her, and is seeking validation from everyone including younger kids, manipulated and gaslights, tells stories... .along with other stuff... My question is, knowing all these red flags, and seeing her "issues" is it possible to maintain a friendship with her, knowing that at some point this will all turn around on me if I let her get to close? I don't know what to think... .ii don't think I'll get hurt by her if I'm aware of her instability from the get go... And don't try to "fix her" or personalize anything... thoughts? Title: Re: Bpd friends? Post by: JackBlacknBlue on July 24, 2014, 11:20:11 PM I think you are best judge of your ability to stay at arm's length enough not to get hurt. I would ask myself if a friendship like that - one in which you're always waiting for the shoe to drop, one in which you have to keep your guard up-is worth it. I am facing same decision about a 'friend'. My T tells me that I'll stay in the friendship as long as the upside outweighs the downside. I find that trade-off varies. We have a great time sometimes, and other times it is pure nightmare.
I find it very hard to stay at arm's length and maintain a friendship. |