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Title: BPD behavior kid aligns with UBPDX in Custody suit how long will this last? Post by: nona on August 03, 2014, 08:34:46 AM This is my assessment of where things are.
proprieties aside. This is my experience. UBPDX and only child and me in a house for 10 years now = me painted black and in a smear campaign, she has joined. Each visit with her now feels exactly like my marriege felt. I am not exaggerating. Am I fighting a losing battle ? Noone understsnds... .you know the story. I would love to hear from someone who has been HERE. D11 lies lies lies about me to Child protection social workers. tells psychologist she is going to refuse more counseling. Title: Re: BPD behavior kid aligns with UBPDX in Custody suit how long will this last? Post by: Panda39 on August 03, 2014, 12:29:31 PM I watched my SO go through this during his separation and divorce it has a name... .Parental Alienation. I suggest learning/reading more about it.
You are not necessarily fighting a losing battle but you are fighting a tough battle and need to act. My SO found that a huge part of counteracting a Parental Alienation campaign was to spend as much time with his daughters as possible. Was it uncomfortable? You bet it was. Was he angry? You bet but he recognized who the instigator was (not his daughters) :)id he love his daughters and want the best for them? You bet so he stuck with it in spite of how awkward it was. The point of trying to spend more time with them was to allow them to see what was real vs the garbage mom was spewing. He also when they were ready started having discussions with them. He loved them... .he validated that they felt like he left them along with mom... .he loved them... .he validated their anger... .he loved them... .he discussed how their false allegations of child abuse could have lead the them not seeing him at all (that there were consequences to what they were saying/doing)... .he loved them... .he countered the BS with facts... .he loved them... .he loved them... .he loved them... . The uBPD ex shot herself in the foot so to speak and my SO ended up with primary custody and everyone is doing well. As teens both daughters have recognized on their own that mom has issues. Are there lingering effects? Yes, there is a change to everyone's trust level vs before the marriage but the more time spent together that continues to build. Do your best to keep your daughter going to therapy that is a fight worth fighting... .your daughter needs a third party that she can talk to and work through this stuff with. Good Luck and don't give up! Your daughter needs you |