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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship => Topic started by: SpringInMyStep on August 18, 2014, 12:31:53 PM



Title: One month after my wife moved out, I met another BPD
Post by: SpringInMyStep on August 18, 2014, 12:31:53 PM
What the hell?

I went on a second date with this woman I had met while my wife and I were still together (we were poly), and as I explained the situation with my wife, she said "Oh I have Borderline too!".

Oy.

So I finished my drink and left, but partially because she already had a guy on his way to meet her at the bar. Seriously, while we were talking, her phone was blowing up and she was arranging to meet someone else.  So typical.

Meanwhile, I'm still in a bit of a funk after my wife moved out. I guess it takes a while to process... .ugh.


Title: Re: One month after my wife moved out, I met another BPD
Post by: Loveofhislife on August 18, 2014, 01:03:41 PM
Just like other addictions: there is a very real tendency to swap one addiction with another. I've had a string of NPD/BPD, so I know I need to get right with me and God FIRST before I start dating again. One day at a time, one step at a time. I don't believe that we just coincidentally attract these people into our lives.


Title: Re: One month after my wife moved out, I met another BPD
Post by: SpringInMyStep on August 18, 2014, 01:08:13 PM
Yeah I'm not rushing into dating, but thought this woman was cool the first time I met her. But the last time, she kept talking about how she liked to shoplift and all this other stuff. I am working on boundaries and listening to the little voice that says "run!".


Title: Re: One month after my wife moved out, I met another BPD
Post by: Loveofhislife on August 18, 2014, 01:16:39 PM
Dear Strawberry ;-) I hope and pray that I will not only hear "run" but that I will obey it! I knew exbfBPD was bad news from the start, but I've been told that  an adrenaline addict, and I got caught up in the game: all of the twists and turns in his house of mirrors. He's a genius software programmer who was gaming me all along, and I just kept playing the game of RISK until it nearly killed me mentally, spiritually, physically, and financially. I think it's time to start getting my adrenaline rush elsewhere. Jumping out of planes would be

MUCH safer!


Title: Re: One month after my wife moved out, I met another BPD
Post by: SpringInMyStep on August 18, 2014, 01:29:56 PM
Haha! Yes, run run run. I think we've all definitely learned something from these relationships and now we know what to watch for.


Title: Re: One month after my wife moved out, I met another BPD
Post by: HopefulDad on August 18, 2014, 07:08:01 PM
I think it's easy to get attracted to someone with PD... .the idealization is strong.


Title: Re: One month after my wife moved out, I met another BPD
Post by: ajr5679 on August 18, 2014, 08:51:37 PM
I have been with four BPD women. my mother was BPD. I stayed friends with two of my exs. when the last one was painting me black I called my exs and told them  that I swear she has BPD. that is when they both told me that they also have it.  the next day I was in the mental ward. that was three years ago and then I thought I was healthy so I took the ex back just to get smacked again.


Title: Re: One month after my wife moved out, I met another BPD
Post by: Loveofhislife on August 19, 2014, 05:35:46 AM
My T recently told me that NPD/BPD is the norm for me after being raised by my father. Since then, I too have been in multiple NPD/BPD relationships. I'm ready for a new norm! However hurt I may have been in the past, I have NEVER been split black like this time where he has cut me off completely after living off me for a year. I guess I needed to see BPD at its worst in order for me to strive to be my best. But I have a LONG way to go.