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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+) => Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship => Topic started by: Bak86 on September 04, 2014, 10:46:57 AM



Title: I fell in her trap
Post by: Bak86 on September 04, 2014, 10:46:57 AM
So my ex and i broke up about 3 months ago. We had a lot of fights afterwards. Since we work together, i could notice her behavior in any way. Last time we had a fight was about a month and a half ago, over nothing(as always with BPD's), then we both went cold silent. Didn't speak to her for a month. About 2 weeks ago i noticed a change in her behavior. She suddenly started to dress nice, stared at me from across the room and she started talking to me again. I also had the feeling she tried to make me jealous by talking about how many dates she had to a coworker when i was sitting next to her and she was flirting with a coworker she didn't even like when we were together. So yeah, we started talking today and me being stupid, asked if she wanted to get together sometime. She would absolutely not want to meet me outside work. Things were peaceful in her mind at this moment and she wanted to keep it that way. Told her i missed her company... .she didn't respond and she started texting like mad to(what i assume) her friends. I thought this was a recycle attempt by her, but apparently it's not? Confused as hell... .

Guess i have to go no contact again... .


Title: Re: I fell in her trap
Post by: OutOfEgypt on September 04, 2014, 10:58:41 AM
Could be a recycle attempt.  Could be just the beginning of a recycle attempt.

Either way, she got what she wanted... .to know that you still want her, miss her, and pine away after her.  That is what it's really all about.  Same with her talking about other guys to a friend with you in earshot.  I think you are right to think that was probably intentional.

Just remember that "no contact" is for you, so that you can become stabilized and stronger.  If that is what you need to do, then yes... .do it.


Title: Re: I fell in her trap
Post by: Bak86 on September 04, 2014, 04:11:41 PM
Could be a recycle attempt.  Could be just the beginning of a recycle attempt.

Either way, she got what she wanted... .to know that you still want her, miss her, and pine away after her.  That is what it's really all about.  Same with her talking about other guys to a friend with you in earshot.  I think you are right to think that was probably intentional.

Just remember that "no contact" is for you, so that you can become stabilized and stronger.  If that is what you need to do, then yes... .do it.

Yeah i guess that's it... .

And yeah i will go no contact, the last time i did it it made me happy, but i got sucked back in. This time hopefully no contact for good... .