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Im curious as to what it finally took for others to sever the ties or at least start the process od severing the ties.

I had so many red flags and things that didnt seek right but for me it was the tearful confession that started "this is where you abandon me". I suspected she was in a relationship with a cousin thirty years her senior as knew her methods. She claimed he was helping her and providing therapy. She said she would smoke weed with him and it helped her anxiety. I suspected they were intimate but I just brushed it off as crazy thoughts. She had been molested by her father as a child and I thought there is no way she could do this. But she confessed during one of her breakdowns. One of her close friends confided in me that she had become infatuated with her elderly cousin and was infuriated when he wouldnt marry her. She was convinced her mother was the other woman in the relationship. Upon hearing this I could not process nor fathom this information. During this time her twenty year old son cryptically warned me his mother ruined his life and psychologically terrorizes people. I tried to process for two weeks and became physically ill I was so disgusted. During this time I realize she was setting me up for a recycle. I addressed the situation in a very blunt and cruel way. I was called a victim and a loser and a stalker and painted very very black. The next morning I had a voice mail from her not mad or hurt but almost confused sounding that stated you may think Im a piece of crap but I cant believe we are never going to speak again. I did not reply... .NC.

I am mechanic and I watch machines work and take them apart and fix or rebuild them when they are broken. Grasping this condition is so confusing and frustrating for me.

I made the decision to walk away when one day, his behavior was so twisted and hurtful, that my hair stood on end.  The flight response in my body kicked in and led the way.    I could no longer intellectualize/rationalize his behavior.    My body said, "go, go, go, run."

I have left for Christmas with my family – my family is from Brazil, we were living in Germany, she's german. 6 days later she would join me, and we were supposed to travel around Brazil. I was super happy I could show her around etc. And I gave the plane tickets as a gift; the trip was planned together for months. Last day in Germany, she betrays me with a friend from college. Then she comes to Brazil, arrives at my place and tells me that she wants a life and kids with him, she's actually straight (we had a gay relationship for 1 and a half year) and yes, she had betrayed me with him and she liked (insert here some graphic details).

She never travelled with me. I was left alone for New Year's and vacation. They are still together, as far as I know. After that, I have left Germany for good, came back to Brazil to restart my life. Two months ago she writes me saying that she's coming to live in Brazil in 2015. :-/ As far as I know, no plans to come back together with me.

I am still recovering from the trauma, 9 months later.

i decided to enough was enough after this last recycle. we had been apart for 8 months with some LC but nother else. She reched out for me and I fell. BUt I was a little in reserve cauase I knew what to expect from her. I dedided that if the lying and pushing away started again I was done. It did and then she lied again to me so I walked. I had out up with that kind of behavior for 3 years and it started at the 4 month mark and I forgave and I kept forgiving it for the whole 3 years. It never got better and I guess why should it. She figured out that no matter what she did I would always take her back so why not take advantage of me.