BPDFamily.com

so we've been apart for about 2 months now and I'm super happy about it. I've come a long way in processing everything... .putting myself first, treating myself, I've got all my friends back, lots of me time, etc.

I only saw her once and that was only because she had to sign some papers for my condo refinance. I don't think she's doing so well, but then like most BPDs, they want you to think they're doing great. She talked about who she's dating and everything (she's polyamorous, typical) and to me it's so obvious that she's trying to attach herself to as many people as possible to deal with her abandonment issues.

the thing is, I keep looking at her online dating profile to remind myself how completely ridiculous she is. it just makes me so mad. it's probably not healthy to look at it all the time, but the part that really makes me crazy is this "I'm currently dating a couple. This is fun and satisfying, but I'm interested in meeting more people to have more fun and love with". LOVE? She's known these people for about a month. She told me about them and they sound about as messed up and dysfunctional as she is.

Then why do I have a twinge of something... .I don't know, jealousy?... .when I read that. I am by choice not dating right now, nor do I want to "date a couple", especially those two. I think her lifestyle is disgusting because I know that her choices are risky and questionable and symptomatic of her BPD and I don't believe for a minute that she even knows what love is.

It kinda makes my stomach turn, but bothers me still 

My ex left me to "be alone" as she said she didn't take time to grieve her previous relationship.  Low and behold. Within 2 months, she is 'in love' with my replacement.  I then discovered her profile on Match.  It shocked me to read it as her self description was NOT her - it was ME!   Wow!

Ugh... .they definitely don't even skip a beat when moving to the next person. Because we were polyamorous, she used that as an excuse to not work on our relationship and just keep going with other people.

My exBPD (who's 35 with 2 daughters) ditched me for 24-year-old guy and immediately they were "in a relationship" and he was Mr. Wonderful. But, then he ended being an alcoholic, bi-polar, and borderline. He actually went missing (along with a different girl) for a whole week and it was even a top story in the local news that week. (that story is a whole other post... .). It blew my mind that she entered a relationship with this guy when she was used to an upper, middle class lifestyle AND she has 2 daughters to look after.

As soon as that guy disappeared and never came back, she moved onto his roommate, who is also at least 10 years younger than her and now this guy is Mr. Wonderful. So, no they can't be alone... .they attach themselves to somebody (doesn't matter who) and suck the life out of them until they ditch them for a fresh supply.

That's the way it goes... .

I think I need to stop looking at her profile because I'm not really sure what purpose it serves at this point. I'm just still so angry! I don't know how to stop being this angry. I just really hate her. Grrr.

Yeah, this summer I dealt with a lot of anger and hate in my heart. I knew it wasn't good. It has faded over time.

I know it sounds cliche, but my advise is to focus on you and other things besides her. Stop looking at her profile, get off Facebook, and use this opportunity to do explore other avenues, hobbies, or just other women. Anything that takes your mind and focus off of her.

thanks  :)

I already blocked her on FB - it's one of the first things I did. So this dating profile is the only thing I can see by googling her.

I think I'll make it a contest with myself to see if I can go several days without checking it.

I am really focuing on myself but I just don't know when this anger will fade.

Even though we all have our paths in life, it's hard to see someone you've really cared about making such self-damaging decisions. Looking in the mirror, it was hard seeing myself making them, too. So I altered course. As have you.

This thread made me check for lols.

Interests: Honesty, Women, Doing Good, Nightlife, Love, Intelligence... .

That was a good laugh. Thanks BPDF.

Then I got to the music section and half of her favorite bands were mine, the other half were hers.

Can't decide if this is really weird or really funny.

This was a hard copy of my case.

The new guy was 10 15 years younger, he gets laid so she can have a in a relationship status on facebook, when he  wants sex, all he have to do is change his status to single, after a day it is back to normal again.


She seem crazy occupied being in a relationship, she adjust the dates on facebook to make the impression the relationship where started earlier all the time. The relatonships are mostly fantasy based, after I had left her,  she was heavily infatuated in me,

She was in a big time relationship with me that did not existed, I did not contacted her. Any relationship will do for her, the other person in it are merely an object neccesary to enable it, or a buddy for being sexual with.

You just described my exBPD to the letter...


Me 40, her 32, oldest son (stepson) 14 s12, d10, d8.

Replacement 28, he became less usefulls so she moved on to the room mate

Room mate 24 and now the 'soul mate'

Its almost like a shallow sappy 'Lifetime' movie. Change the names and the scenery and twist the plot. BPDs become quite predictable in a way

yup mine is on his online dating account everyday too. We are left reeling and they just go on to the next source of comfort.

YES! When she was "in a relationship" with the first guy, she had pictures of them plastered all over facebook (even though he didn't have an account). It took less than 2 weeks after getting involved with this guy before she changed her FB status.

And yes, he was getting a lot of sex out of it on his end.

He is only using her as a sex object, but she seem to be happy sbout it. Wonder if this is abuse without she even know. She does everyhing to keep him , so she can have her fb status.