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Title: Who Am I Post by: Joseph54 on September 26, 2014, 01:53:34 AM I have been married for 4 years to a woman who portrays all the traits of a BPD.
I believe my mother was also BPD which is why I was attracted to my wife in order to resolve my mother issues. I get it and I'am recently separated from my wife. On the road to healing and not becoming involved in an unhealthy relationship anymore. We have been separated before a few times and never really changed our living arraignments from when we first dated. Each of our children have stayed in their own homes and my wife spent weekends at my house since we met 7 years ago. I am presently dealing with the loss of my marriage and wife. I am going through the rollercoaster of emotions and pains of separation. I have a good support system of friends, counsellor, support group, family and church. My present struggle is dealing with the transition and staying out of a recycle. I have been encouraged by those who have posted that they are determined to respect themselves and heal from the relationship. Joe :) Title: Re: Who Am I Post by: Mutt on September 26, 2014, 02:38:59 PM I am presently dealing with the loss of my marriage and wife. I am going through the rollercoaster of emotions and pains of separation. I have a good support system of friends, counsellor, support group, family and church. My present struggle is dealing with the transition and staying out of a recycle. Hi Joe, My heart goes out to you. I'm sorry for everything that is going on, you have a lot on your plate. Separation is tough. I share a similar experience. I'm happy to hear that you have a good support network. Did you leave her or she left you? I ask because if you leave it triggers their fear of abandonment and they hound you with calls etc. If a pwBPD leaves you they go radio silent. Title: Re: Who Am I Post by: purpleavocado on September 26, 2014, 03:37:00 PM Welcome, Joe! I'm sorry that you have to be here, but I find that it really does help. Things will get better, I promise. Especially with a great support network.
Title: Re: Who Am I Post by: Joseph54 on September 26, 2014, 04:45:17 PM Hi Mutt & Anad,
Thanks for the encouragement. I took her up on a recent " l wanna divorce tirades" She has been contacting me quite often, wants to see me, wants to have sex, wants to kill herself ect. I have seen her twice this week and it is very difficult being with her. I feel nervous and pity her distress but I do not want to go back, I know I can't, as it is killing me. She does feel abandoned and has expressed the need to be with someone. She has involved herself more with church as well as a support group for people going through separation and divorce. Can a person have sex with their BPD ex and stay separate in order to heal? Joe :) |