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Title: I have changed Post by: borderdude on September 27, 2014, 04:37:52 PM I feel this 2nd BPD encounter has done something with me-
The manipulation, lying , etc. I have been reliving scenes from my abusive childhood, my mother was a BPD/bipolar type. Feeling empty, are not attracted towards healthy individuals as before, my interests are fading. I think I was occupied to fix her , so I could really fix my childhood and myself in the process, a naive faulty codependent or caregiver way of thinking Title: Re: I have changed Post by: clljhns on September 28, 2014, 04:24:47 AM rolfie123,
Isn't it wonderful when we make those connections in our healing? So happy to hear that you can recognize the unhealthy patterns you found yourself in. Now, what do you plan to do with this knowledge about yourself? Peace and blessings. :) Title: Re: I have changed Post by: yogibear60 on September 28, 2014, 09:03:49 AM Oh, I so agree with clljhns. The fact that you have been able to connect and generalize what you have learned to other life situations is in my opinion a wonderful gift. The gift of knowing.
Title: Re: I have changed Post by: borderdude on September 28, 2014, 09:13:25 AM Thanks for the support , I have grown here by communication with you. It is time review what I learned , focus on myself and thereby attract normal people in my life.
My case is ending, we have parted , and there will never be us again. --- in case you wanna know ... . She is engaged now :), with a man that for only 4 days set his FB "relationship status" to single so he could break free from her. She really has done ""everything"" to keep him :) I am so glad I did not got engaged with this crazy person. Title: Re: I have changed Post by: borderdude on September 29, 2014, 09:24:43 AM I have done some introspective thoughts ... .
I now review my encounter as a big denial of responsibility towards myself. By relate to a sick person, you avoid the real world. A real person with genuine feelings have no needs for drama. A mental sick person lives in a fantasy world, immature craves unrealistic needs. You must relate to this person in a codependent care-giving mode, then you are revealed from your own feelings and needs, witch you put last, and then can focus on addictive drama and the fantasy world your BPD partner relives. A genuine real person will crave realistic expectations and embrace vulnerability. |