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Title: Discarded Post by: Harlygirl on October 01, 2014, 07:00:11 PM When do I stop feeling USED... .USED... .USED?
Title: Re: Discarded Post by: fromheeltoheal on October 01, 2014, 07:17:41 PM Borderline personality disorder is about the need to feel good, by using another human being, so your feeling of being used is accurate, and it is very painful, I get it.
And the way to stop feeling used is to use it right back, use the experience to learn and grow, and in the process heal; pain is a great motivator, probably the best one, so if you make sure the borderline is out of your life and set about improving the quality of it, life will get very, very good, and it takes what it takes. Take care of you! Title: Re: Discarded Post by: Deeno02 on October 01, 2014, 07:23:26 PM It truly is a bad feeling. Im 4 weeks in. Today was her birthday so naturally i blew snot bubbles all the way to work thinking of what could have been and her and the replacement. Had to be done. Your going to have more lightbulb moments as you read other posts and material. Its going to hurt, not gonna lie. But you will see things that have happened you may have forgotten or repressed and it will anger you. Use that anger. No one deserves to be treated like we have. No one.
Title: Re: Discarded Post by: fred6 on October 01, 2014, 07:30:41 PM When do I stop feeling USED... .USED... .USED? If it's any consolation to you. If your exSO has new suppy, they are being USED... .USED... .USED also. They used the ones before you and will continue to use the ones after you endlessly. Title: Re: Discarded Post by: Harlygirl on October 01, 2014, 07:58:53 PM Thank you all so much for helping me get through a bad day and back on track... ... ..feeling as though things are becoming less foggy... .Carry on
Title: Re: Discarded Post by: Caredverymuch on October 01, 2014, 08:09:02 PM When do I stop feeling USED... .USED... .USED? Harlygirl I am sending you a Bc I know the feeling. I have asked the same often. I feel the same in my weaker moments yet. Please know you were not used. Being used insinuates intent, as in seeking out a victim. pBPD do not do this. The disorder, and the associated behaviors, are what leaves us feeling used. Disrespected. For many who were truly abandoned with no closure or a sense of even a goodbye, as I was, there is an incredible sense of being used. You were not used. Nor was I. Our partners have a very serious mental illness. They loved to the best of the ability that the disorder allows. It hurts a great deal in detaching. The disorder exists to deny itself. Keep learning. Keep posting for support. Take good care of yourself. You were not used Title: Re: Discarded Post by: Deeno02 on October 01, 2014, 08:57:11 PM And hope upon hope they dont recycle you. Its my biggest fear...
Title: Re: Discarded Post by: fromheeltoheal on October 01, 2014, 09:14:16 PM And hope upon hope they dont recycle you. Its my biggest fear... Remembering of course that 'recycling' takes two, and we would only reestablish a relationship with an ex if we decided to. It's common to give away our power in these relationships, for a number of reasons, but part of taking it back is being strong enough to do what's best for ourselves. There's help all over this site, and hopefully we have supportive people in our lives in the real world, so there's no reason to 'recycle' unless we want to. |