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Well tomorrow morning will mark the 2 year anniversary of me calmly saying "GTFO" to my ex. No contact since - not a peep either way. Thank God.

I will always love her. I loved cocaine and booze too BUT I know I can't have them in my house!

To those of you in the early days on NC stick with it. Just don't take that that first sip of BPD liquor. After a while the obsession fades ... .one day at a time.

I also want to thank BPD Family, CoDA and ACoA - I could not have done it on my own.

Noli

Congratulations on all of your progress.   I've never been a regular user of drugs but I know that I definitely had an addiction to my exBPD.   In the beginning she was everything   

I thought I wanted, she was attractive, funny, smart , and overdosed me on compliments and sex.    The saying that ignorance is bliss must be true because I know my life would have worked a lot more smoothly for the better without having to have gotten firsthand knowledge of BPD.    I ve got one more month and I will hit the two year mark as well.   During the two years I've blocked everything , email, phone , social media.     I've not heard a peep.    I did see her close who#e associate not too long ago in a store and I ran out of that place as fast as I could push my buggy threw checkout while she was blurting questions at me across the store.   

Congratulations Noli!  I think you are spot on, treat it like the addiction it is.  When I understood this and what the trauma bond was between us it made things much easier to deal with and accept.  And it also made me realise how I used the trauma bond as a coping mechanism to life, not much different than other compulsions I've had over the years such as alcohol, food and drugs.

I should add another 12 step fellowship that helped me in the first few months of "withdrawal" - Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous (SLAA).  They have great phone meetings.

I tell you ... .the withdrawal was worse than anything I had experienced with chemical addictions (booze and cocaine). I thought I was gonna die in the first week!

It sure is n takes away from my present relationship.  I have such a great pull to end my misery n reach out but I was treated so badly after several breakup the prize is not worth all that pain as well .  its still hard even with a wonderful women n that's not fair to her but it has been better on certain days. I realize the desire is my problem not my ExBPDgf.

Congrats Noli!