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Children, Parents, or Relatives with BPD => Son, Daughter or Son/Daughter In-law with BPD => Topic started by: Elbry on October 21, 2014, 04:08:36 PM



Title: It's official, she's going to RTC
Post by: Elbry on October 21, 2014, 04:08:36 PM
DD15 is still in the crisis unit, she has been in there for 8 days now.  She has been accepted at a RTC where she will do a DBT/CBT based program.  The plan is for her to be admitted to the RTC sometime next week and she will remain in the crisis unit until then.  She will be allowed to leave the CCSU on pass to pack for RTC the day before we go down. 

The RTC is in a quaint little coastal town, tiny town actually.  6 bed home, girls only.  Unfortunately, it's 4.5 hours away, one way.  With family therapy once a week... .ugg.  It's gonna be hard.  It is possible to do some sessions by phone, but I think I will be making that long drive a lot.  After one month, if she does well, she will come home for one weekend a month.  If that goes well for a couple months, it gets bumped up to 2 weekends. 

Staff from the RTC came up to meet with us at the CCSU and to do an interview.  During the meeting, the clinician for the CCSU said that some of the staff there are actually intimidated by DD because she comes off so intelligent, and is so sarcastic and some of them don't know how to handle her or deal with her.  That kind of took me by surprise.  She is so non-violent that the idea of someone being intimidated by her is weird to me.  But then again, she is non-violent to others and very violent against herself, I guess they have to worry about that too. 

Anyways, it's official, she's going.  I'm a mess.  I'm so upset about it.  I don't want her to go.  I know she needs to go but I am going to miss her so much, and I am having to trust others to watch out for her.  I just hope I'm doing the right thing.



Title: Re: It's official, she's going to RTC
Post by: SeaSprite on October 21, 2014, 07:04:56 PM
 

You are doing the best with what you have... .and that is always the right thing.

Some people are intimidated by smart-mouthed kids... .when I was a teen I had few filters and when I was feeling angry or upset, my brain and mouth seemed to run off ahead of adults around me, and not in a good way. I wasn't so quick with other kids though, probably because I cared what my peers thought but didn't give a rip about adults. They didn't even register as really human to me yet.

Hoping the best for you and your d! That drive sounds like a time management challenge. Any books you've been meaning to read that you can get on audio? 





Title: Re: It's official, she's going to RTC
Post by: pessim-optimist on October 21, 2014, 08:13:55 PM
Anyways, it's official, she's going.  I'm a mess.  I'm so upset about it.  I don't want her to go.  I know she needs to go but I am going to miss her so much, and I am having to trust others to watch out for her.  I just hope I'm doing the right thing.

Of course you are apprehensive... . 

Do you have Skype? Maybe you could do some sessions via Skype - it's better than phone, because everyone can see each other.

Do you trust this RTC? If it's the right place for her - you know that that's the decision you have been fighting for.


Title: Re: It's official, she's going to RTC
Post by: nzmum on October 21, 2014, 10:40:45 PM
  Elbry

The RTC sounds like a fantastic opportunity for your DD15 to get the help she needs and deserves. 

It is natural that you're sad and you will miss her but think of the outcome and all the possibilities and opportunities her future could hold when the program is done.

You are fortunate such programs are available in your part of the world.  In NZ it is all outpatients for the under 20's.   :'(

Kia-kaha (Maori = be strong)