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So a month ago to the day, she left me. We lived together, started college together and spent all our time together. Basically She felt smothered, didn't like that we didn't do anything she said she wanted "to explore" she wanted "no limitations, or restrictions". blah blah blah. I was broken up as hell for awhile and I am now just starting to get a grip. We were together for 2.5 years and she meant the world to me and she told me I meant the world to her. I have no friends, had to put a dog down that was in my family for 13 years, and my brother told me he was moving to another state all within the week after she left. I had no one to talk to and was very hurt. I told her the day I moved her back into her house I couldn't be in her life anymore. She freaked out and I gave her a hug and left.

So basically I have been on strict NC since the day I moved her back in her house. She has reached out a couple of times over the last couple of weeks, saying she is lonely, sorry, and she misses and still loves me. In one email she thanked me for being in her life so long and giving her so much love. She just wants to know I am "ok", thats all she keeps asking. Last night she called 4 times and left 2 voice mails asking me to talk to her and that she just wanted to know I am ok, and not to ignore her. She sent me a friend request on Facebook ad told me she just wanted to talk to me, she still wanted me in her life, and she misses and loves me. She said she would leave me alone if she just talked to me because she has some things shse needs to talk about. So yeahhh thats where I am right now. It is difficult enough going to the same school and seeing her every now and then from afar. And I think about her all the time and am having trouble getting over her. But than again its only been a month, so I am making slow progress.

Should I remain NC? I don't know whether to talk to her or not. She did me wrong, I have done WAY more for her than she has ever done for me and she just left me. I want closure but I feel like she just wants to know I am "ok" just so she doesn't feel bad about what she is doing. And she still wants me in her life just to use me because I was the only other person besides her mom who gave her unconditional love. Well at least these are my theories.

Do you think her concern for you is really out of concern for you, or to make her feel better? If you initiate contact, what will you get out of it (that's healthy)?

I've asked myself this question many times, and this may be hard for those of us with Caretaker traits: "She wants to be friends. It's obviously good for her, but is it good for me?"