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As I wrote in the other thread she tried to make contact covertly through our team. She left the team a month ago when she wasn’t allowed to play due to tactical reasons. Guess she felt abandonded, even told our coach that the team didn’t even try to integrate her anymore (which is true because for some weeks the team was getting the ST when she didn’t attend practice and noone knew what was going on). She discarded the whole team by telling them she leaves, made it obvious she wouldn’t be coming back even for a farewell party (she’ll be transferred some time in the future to another city due to work situations). From the day she left until now I had been NC for five weeks. Didn’t congratulate her on her birthday and two days later she showed up at a match to watch it. Just out of the blue. That day I experienced something REALLY creepy I had experienced one time before. Right after the discard when she was still in practice and in the team she tried to not look at me at all and when it was very angrily, I could see her contempt through her eyes. But the day she left the team and especially the day she out oft he blue came to visit a match she looked at me very different. Not that she made it obvious she was looking at me but the way she did was so creepy… Like some pedophile looking at young children (I don’t want to be insensitive here but it really felt like this). Like some wild animal hunting for prey. Thgere was no contempt in her gaze but some weird interest, curiosity and it also seemed like some desire or longing. But also kind of shame. I don’t know how to describe it. She examined my whole body from head to toes with that weird expression and I can’t put my finger on it what that was about. But it seems like she’s changed the way she thinks of me or something. This was so creepy. Like she was trying to feel me out big time.

Did something similar happen to you? What’s about this creepy stare? It was so different from the times aright after the discard. This time I couldn’t feel contempt from her. This even made me feel guilty for abandoning her in going NC when actually she was the one who told me to leave her alone.

I think I know what you mean. Mine had a stare too when somethign happened and she wanted to make up after a few days. After all the craziness she would come back and she 'd have this childlike inviting stare with such a strong longing that made it almost impossible to resist (which in effect makes me the paedophile... .). I wondered about this stare myself too. I think in her case is a stare of deep deep longing and desire that comes out with tremendous intensity. This can have actual impacts on the receiving end. I used to get very excited by this. In fact my ex is not particularly physically atrractive but when she got into that mode I got sexually aroused.