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I had an office party from work last night. I work in a large office, so the party was quite big. It was really really fun. Anyway, last two weeks i felt that my ex was painting me white again. She was asking me out for coffee during work, i always refuse and when i go out for coffee with coworkers she always joins us, even though she hates those coworkers. Couple of days ago she mentioned that she did my work while i was sick 2 weeks ago and yesterday she wanted to help me with work as well. And when i mentioned to a coworker that i would go to the party, she instantly signed up as well. So i was a bit on guard, because i'm not really looking forward to a recycle. And yesterday i went to dinner with a coworker before the party and he mentioned that he had a feeling that she was missing me, he could see it in her eyes. That kind of freaked me out, to hear it from another person. I was expecting her to try to recycle me at the party, but nothing... .

Went to the party with a coworker, his girlfriend and a friend of hers.(left my new "girlfriend" at home, because i was afraid of my ex) It really was fun! :) Then all of a sudden i see my ex, she turned up with a friend. Thought she would come say hi to us, but oh no. She didn't say hi, nor did she even approach me the whole night. I even bumped in to her when i went to the bathroom. She didn't look at me. She had a huge grin on her face and a complete blank stare, as if she was dissociating. She was talking all night with her friend and another coworker. This is a male coworker and i noticed her talking to him a couple of times before at work, but he is not her type at all and i believe he's married. So i didn't worry about it too much, but last night i really found it weird that she was talking to him all night long, yet she's the type that goes on the dance floor and dances all night long. I also have to mention that she agreed to go to the party with a female coworker. The female coworker arrived at the party, said hi to us, asked where my ex was and she talked to her maybe for like 5 minutes. The female coworker wandered around alone all night long. So i guess my ex ditched her  lol

So yeah, thought she would recycle me, but ignoring all the way i guess  lol Maybe she tried to get me jealous? Because i dislike that male coworker? Fun night, but so weird.

A couple of things to bear in mind.

one BPD dont have a type just a supply. A married man mihht be just what she wants as theres little chance of a full on relationship.

secondly she may have been trying to make you jealous but so what. Is it your ego that wants her to wamt you? I know that my ego wants this just to validate that I wasnt just another notch on her bedpost.  The only person that can truly hurt you with her behaviour is you. By stressing about what she may or may not do you are applying pressure that is purely perceived. Some planning is good but you cant plan for every eventuality so dont stress about what may never happen.

My ex was involved with 2 married guys in the past. Maybe more, who knows? She actually got pregnant by one of them. No telling how many people she's screwed that were in relationships.

Bak86, I would have to agree. Try not to worry about what will happen with her. From what I've read around here. The second you forget about them, they try to recycle lol... .

Yeah it's annoying. Ignoring them harder, makes them even try harder to get under your skin. Blah 

I would agree with this. The only caveat is that it is likely hard for a pwBPD to be in the presence of an ex and not think about them. That was the case with my ex anyway. She basically begged for me to spend "a little bit" (as she put it) of time with her when I saw her after we began to detach. I think she has a hard time when she is physically around exes. It's all so strange looking back. I am fortunate not to have to see her. You don't sound so lucky.

Last night was interesting. But with each day comes something new. And yes I'm mildly angry, but that's an improvement. Bull___ Artist basically sums her up. Except she is truly dangerous and suffering newfound damage to her already fragile ego and to her reputation as a care provider. What a joke. She must be... .anyway, this is about my healing and expressing myself and hoping to help others.

I've been shaken pretty hard throughout life and did not need this living hell either. But I asked for it and I got it. I was the one walking blindly, not setting firm boundaries, and basically avoiding to ask any hard questions to find out more about this woman that I was now professing my love for. I am accepting personal responsibility, but no longer blaming myself. I'm so much happier out. And truly glad she was able to latch onto some new supply. The older they get the harder that will become. Haha. Your supply will eventually end, but your burning desires will not.

I used to think that the past didn't matter all that much, until I learned of yet another complete and total lie and her not telling me her ex husband has been HIV+ for over a decade and when she found out she still married him. I don't know about the later part of that, but the HIV+ status was real. I read it in the divorce papers. Apparently she's safe and I've tested negative 2x so far. I believe I will be okay. I've just entered my second month out. Imagine finding that out on your third day of NC by court order after having her arrested for 2xassult 1xharrassemnt and 1xstrangulation as she attempted to smother me with both hands and her bodyweight after I fell asleep.

I'm taking back my power and not giving her anymore of myself to feed on. The Assistant DA informed me that the OP will be in effect FOR LIFE! Thank you God. One oddball contact and she goes to jail. I think I can safely say I'm done for good and things are looking so much better for me already. I'm back driving my own bus again - how it should be. And I don't need to have a woman next to be to be happy. I though woman wanted love and companionship, not the pile of sh^t that I received. And I'm vowing, after this to keep it that way. No commitments for a while. No moving in together. No more rushing into a fantasy. It's time to put the proof back into the pudding. What does that actually mean?

She is a true Witch and I feel for the poor ass (even though it hurts and I'm not getting my abuse dose) that SOB truly has no idea what he into. Quite the sticky web. So glad I am out. But learning the truth and not having much of a clue until the very end was quite painful. But a great lesson learned.

I was able to cut her off and she can no longer feed me the cowardly abuse. Her pride? I think not. She's losing her game and she knows it. I'm too (********) for her and it kills her that she's forced to have to disconnect by law (force). No more of her harassment and spiteful behaviors. No more random, but quite intentional, manipulation and practicing lies. No more everything that has anything to do with you. I cut off her head and I'm in love with every minute of it. That's what she gets for trying to completely destroy me nonstop. And this isn't over. We still have business to address through the court system. My lawyer is on board and soon enough I will begin MY attack and get back what belongs to me.

How's that for a Crazy Bi&ch?

I'm glad I'm out and you should be too. Good luck moving forward.

Lying is a sport to them. Well at least it was to her.

Her mind is stuck in grade school because she acts like a spoiled child and behaves like the angry little girl that the cute boys just don't like. Probably beats them up too. Because she knows they can't fight back without being named a pussy. Pussy, pussy, pussy. I'll not forget anytime soon.

It's ok. While she is still bothering me, it doesn't affect me as it used to. I mean, she still annoys me, but not as nearly as much as in the past. Ignoring her is still the best option i guess.

Yeah they have the mindset of a 5 year old. I'm glad i'm out and i found someone else.