|
Title: "I was expecting you to sweep me off my feet" Post by: ADecadeLost on November 18, 2014, 09:00:11 PM Received those words in a text from my ex-dBPD wife earlier this evening.
The words don't surprise me, but they still piss me off at this point. It's the type of BS I expect, but haven't had to experience thus far through 3 months of legal separation. Now I'm cringing about having to deal with the BS that will come over the remaining 3 months until the papers are finalized (damn uncontested divorce requirements). I'd love to go NC, but can't for the sake of keeping the divorce uncontested. As it stands, she doesn't want my money and has agreed that the dog should stay with me, and I'm just hesitant to do anything that could change that (particularly in regards to the dog). Anyone dealt with this? Have any suggestions? I'm feeling great at this point, feeling a freedom I haven't felt in a decade, and I don't want to let her destroy that. Any help would be appreciated. Title: Re: "I was expecting you to sweep me off my feet" Post by: david on November 19, 2014, 07:04:17 AM Keep things business like and don't take the bait. The emotional aspect is difficult to deal with in the beginning. It takes time to be truly emotionally detached. It does get better.
Title: Re: "I was expecting you to sweep me off my feet" Post by: ForeverDad on November 19, 2014, 08:52:50 AM She can destroy your freedom only if you allow her to do so. Even if you do have to have some contact with her for a few more months, as others have said, ":)on't let her rent space in your head." It's up to you whether to stay in control of your life, you don't have to hand her the reins. Boundaries, gotta love them.
Title: Re: "I was expecting you to sweep me off my feet" Post by: maxen on November 19, 2014, 09:10:44 AM As it stands, she doesn't want my money and has agreed that the dog should stay with me, and I'm just hesitant to do anything that could change that (particularly in regards to the dog). good. keep the goal in mind. it's only three months, believe me, only three months. Title: Re: "I was expecting you to sweep me off my feet" Post by: ADecadeLost on November 20, 2014, 07:20:38 PM Thank you all for the replies. The last few days have made it evident that she's having second thoughts, but it's too late for that. In the 3 months since she filed papers, I've found a sense of freedom that I haven't felt in years. I'm myself again for the first time in a long time and, as much as part of me will always love her, I can't ever go back to living with the nagging fear that I'll be dealing with her next blow up any moment. That's not life, and I'm not sure how I ever thought it was.
Just 3 more months, and I will all be over. Just need to stay the course for now. |